The Aurora Shooting and the Assholes That Exploit It

I've avoided talking about the tragedy in Aurora, Colorado. It's the main reason why I haven't posted a review of the Dark Knight Rises on this blog like I did the Avengers and Amazing Spider-Man. I wish I could, but there are just some things too tragic to make dick, poop, and tit jokes about. This is not one of them. A tragedy like this is a truly horrendous event and one that captures the country's attention in ways that Columbine and Virginia Tech once did. While the loss of life is horrific, I never cease to be amazed by how people come together in the face of tragedy. Say what you will about how fucked up this world is, but people as a whole can be pretty damn awesome in ways that will never be shown in a movie or a comic book. Even the celebrities we think are assholes can be heroes both in and out of costume. Christian Bale showed that recently and he deserves the same praise he got for playing Batman so awesomely.

This is how celebrities prove they're not douche-bags.

Now I refuse to simply recap on the details of this tragedy. By now, most everyone knows what happened that left 12 people dead and dozens more injured. I refuse to even mention the name of asshole who did it without a shred of remorse. On this blog, I'll simply refer to him as Loony Microcock. Mr. Microcock has horrified the public in ways that no movie or comic ever could. The scariest part is he did it in a place most people feel safe. A movie theater ranks right up there as one of those places where you don't expect some baby dick psychopath to just start shooting people. And there's no reason or larger plan behind it. The guy was just fucking crazy. Even his own parents didn't doubt that when word of the tragedy broke out that he was the one responsible. That indicates he was just not right in the head. There's nothing we can do about shit like that. No amount of violence in media, video games, comic books, moral decay, or godlessness would have changed that.

Yet as people attempt to heal from this tragedy, there will be assholes that seek to exploit it. That happens after every tragedy. The talking heads of Fox News, the religious right, and the moral crusaders of this country will stand on the highest podium and shout at the top of their lungs that the reason this happened was because everybody didn't think and act exactly like they do. There are a great many dick moves in this world, but that's very close to the top. It's already happening. Some are already attempting to tie the shooting to the affect of comic books, often referencing an old Frank Miller story called the Dark Knight Returns.

This is a great story that didn't cause any violence for over 20 years.

The same thing happened after Columbine when parents and men who pander to voters or the Rush Limbaugh crowd blamed Marilyn Manson and violent video games. It's happening again with assholes like this massive douche-bag who tries to die the shooting to abortion. Then there's this Olympian dick cheese who thinks liberals are to blame. There's also this brain dead eunuch who tied the shooting to a lack of (his) god in the public. These people are always going to be there to exploit tragedy. As much as most normal human beings with a sense of decency would like to see them keeled over a toilet with explosive diarrhea, they aren't worth the attention.

Over the next few weeks, we an expect plenty of drama about this tragedy. We can expect every major news outlet to cover the trial of Mr. Microcock and all the talking heads to offer their input over what and who is to blame and which politicians they should support to avoid it in the future. CHances are the whole gun control debate will erupt again with the Michael Moore's of the world picketing gun shops and condemning America's gun-loving culture. Let me spoil it right now and tell you that they're all full of shit. You could take all the guns away tomorrow and that's not going to change what happened in Aurora. It won't do any justice to the victims or their families. It won't even prevent future tragedies because psychopaths like Mr. Microcok will always find a way.

People shouldn't let this tragedy scare them from going to movie theaters or watching violent movies. I'm not being ferocious this time, but I'd like to offer some perspective. In the year 2010, 30,196 people died in traffic accidents. That's approximately 82 a day. You're far safer sitting in a movie theater than you are at the wheel of a car. So try to remember that before thinking a movie theater is such a dangerous place.

The best anyone can do is show sympathy and compassion to the victims and their families. You can help them in other ways by donating to them through the fine folks at Giving First, who have already set up a special section for the Aurora shooting victims and their families. Above all, don't let the talking heads distract from the tragedy. Shit like this happens and people are going to try and exploit it. You can't avoid it. You can only ignore them and follow Christian Bale's example by consoling the victims and remembering this tragedy. Nuff said.