Sci-Fi Cast Away: Star Wars #33

The following is my review of Star Wars #33, which was posted on PopMatters.com.

In terms of a modern mythos, complete with philosophical, psychological, and cos-playing implications, Star Wars is the standard by which all others are measured. Few other sagas, from Marvel's ever-evolving continuity of reboots and retcons to multiple eras of Star Trek, even come close. It manages to be both incredibly expansive, yet remarkably concise. It's themes, emotions, and drama create a perfect blend that gives it a special place in popular culture.

Given the sheer breadth and scope of Star Wars, it's easy to forget that there are various parts that remain unexplored. Ever since Disney and Marvel began expanding some of those unexplored areas, new elements of that mythos are emerging. Given the iconic status that Star Wars has for generations of fans, it's a careful balancing act. There are only so many ways that Star Wars can be expanded without undermining the larger narrative. Even an iconic mythos cannot withstand the force of too many Jar Jars.

Jason Aaron manages that balancing act better than most, taking full advantage of the gap between A New Hope and The Empire Strikes Back to flesh out elements of Star Wars that never get a chance on a movie screen. One element that never gets much development is the relationship between Luke and Leia. Even without knowing their secret sibling connection, so much of the drama is centered around Leia's constant clashes with Han. It's easy to forget that her story is closely tied to Luke. Aaron, with the artistic talents of Salvador Larroca, use Star Wars #33 as an opportunity to explore that story.

The setup is simple, if not unremarkable by Star Wars standards. Luke and Leia get stranded on a planet that's mostly water and dotted with a few small islands. The circumstances are fairly generic in that it's not part of some larger story arc. It's just another case of a routine mission going horribly wrong, which seems to happen at least once a week for the Rebellion. There's nothing about it that rattles the continuity of the original trilogy. It's basically the sci-fi equivalent of Cast Away, but with more sea monsters and fewer volley balls.

This bland, but simple setup does serve an important purpose though. It puts Luke and Leia in a position where they have to work together and rely on each other to survive. They know they can survive an onslaught of storm troopers and escaping the Death Star. They've even shown they can survive working with Han Solo for more than two weeks and survive. However, their strength is often defined by their ability to be part of a team. They're rarely in a situation where they can only rely on each other.

It makes for some compelling moments, exploring some of the inner struggles within both characters. It's easy to forget between blowing up the Death Star and falling in love with a smuggler that Luke and Leia are still processing some major upheavals. A part of Luke still sees himself as a farm boy and a part of Leia still sees herself as a princess, complete with all the ceremonial formalities. What stands out in Star Wars #33 is just how uneasy they both feel with their previous roles.

There's a distinct sense that being a farm boy never sat well with Luke. Leia shows a similar sentiment. She reveals that at one point, she ran away to escape some of the formalities that come with being a princess. While this puts her at odds with most traditional Disney princesses, it reveals an important element to both characters.

On some levels, they sense that their situations in life aren't right. They sense that they're meant for something else. Aaron gives the impression that the Force is somehow letting them know that their story is tied with that of Darth Vader and the legacy of Anikan Skywalker. They don't know this, given the story's place in the existing Star Wars timeline. However, they do feel it. If it is a manifestation of the Force, then Yoda himself would be proud.

Beyond the personal exploration, there's also some reflection on recent events, relative to the outcome of A New Hope. Leia is still mourning the destruction of Alderan. The emotions don't get too heavy, though. Leia comes off as more hardened than most princesses. She's no Cinderella, but she's no Elsa either. If she ever broke into song, it wouldn't be very uplifting.

These moments of personal insight and inner character struggles are the highlight of Star Wars #33. While they succeed at providing greater insight into Luke and Leia, as characters, the rest of the narrative falls somewhat flat. Their struggles for survival on the island never create much strain. At most, they only ever seem inconvenienced by their situation. There's never any despair, anguish, or strain. Despite one of them being a princess and the other being a farm boy, their outlook on the situation is remarkably dispassionate.

There are some elements that keep the story from becoming too much like Cast Away. They eventually find out that the planet isn't as desolate as they think. That helps put them in a position to escape and even make a few new allies. However, that story is lacking in terms of detail and insight. It comes off as just a simple, convenient way to get Luke and Leia off the planet before readers can start making incest jokes.

There's nothing about the story in Star Wars #33 that feels out of place, out of character, or inconsistent with the larger mythos. Even if parts of the story lack details, it never comes off as flawed or incomplete. The primary strength of the narrative is the deeper exploration of Luke and Leia, as characters.

When all is said and done, they both come off as more complex characters, which can only give greater weight to the iconic narrative that is Star Wars. While that won't stop some fans from cracking incest jokes about Luke and Leia, Star Wars #33 will give them a greater appreciation for who they are as characters. Anyone hoping for more than that, though, is asking too much of the Force.

Final Score: 6 out of 10

Dark Side Die Hard: Star Wars Vader Down #1

The following is my review of Star Wars: Vader Down #1, which was posted on PopMatters.com.

It's the common theme that made Die Hard a successful movie franchise. It spawned a generation of sequels, rip-offs, and parodies, all of which failed to rekindle Sylvester Stallone's career. But it's a theme that still has undeniable appeal, a lone warrior surrounded by enemies having to fight their way out. It's Captain America trapped behind enemy lines surrounded by Nazis. It's Superman trapped in a subterranean cave surrounded by kryptonite-powered cyborgs. It's a classic underdog story in the mold of the Karate Kid and the Mighty Ducks, albeit with more guns and explosions.

But what happens when this classic setup is turned inside out and upside-down? What if it's the Red Skull who's behind enemy lines, surrounded by Captain America's friends? What if it's Lex Luthor trapped in the Fortress of Solitude, surrounded by cyborg Supermen? Does the story still have the same appeal? It's like rooting for the axe murderer in a slasher movie. It tests an audiences sensibilities in uncomfortable ways not seen outside a Marilyn Manson concert. And those are the exact sensibilities that Star Wars Vader Down #1 appeals to.

This isn't the hero escaping the villain. It's the villain escaping the hero. It's not the rebels beating the Empire against overwhelming odds. It's the Empire outwitting the rebels, snatching away a tantalizing sliver of hope. Like cheering for Ivan Drago in a Rocky movie, it sounds like one of those things we shouldn't enjoy. But it's that inverted nature which plays out in Star Wars Vader Down #1 that makes the story uniquely appealing.

It's a story that unfolds seamlessly from recent events in the Star Wars and Darth Vader comic series. However, neither of these books are required reading. Even if Star Wars: A New Hope is the only Star Wars movie you ever saw, you won't be lost at any point. You might be confused by the presence of a homicidal version of C-3PO in Triple-0, but in a good way.

The story feels organic in that it follows Darth Vader's pursuit of Luke Skywalker. He knows he's the one who destroyed the Death Star. He also knows Luke is his son. So he's more than a little motivated to hunt him down and kill anyone or anything that gets in his way, as one would expect of a Sith Lord. However, like diving into a mosh pit at a Metallic concert unprepared, this level of motivation leads Darth Vader into a situation much deadlier than most mosh pits.

Our decidedly unheroic Sith Lord arrives at Vorgas Vas where his secret ally/fangirl, Aphra, says Luke Skywalker has been holding up. It's a setting that has the same feel as a graveyard in a slasher movie in that it's a fitting location for everything to go horribly wrong. There aren't any promiscuous teenagers, but there are plenty of X-wings and space battles. For Star Wars fans, this is every bit as appealing.

Mike Deodato's art really shines here. It's not the Battle of Hoth, but it has the same intense feel. It's dark, detailed, and destructive, the three D's of every successful space battle. Darth Vader, making every character in Top Gun look like rookie, makes the Rebels pay a high price for getting in his way. Even though he's completely surrounded and has no Imperial support, he doesn't retreat or evade the danger. He shoots at it. If he could do it with a smile, he probably could. But being Darth Vader, he doesn't need to.

It's Darth Vader's utter tenacity and his cold attitude that makes him worth rooting for. It's not like rooting for the New England Patriots after another cheating scandal. It's a testament to just how powerful and dangerous Darth Vader really is. Throw an entire squadron of X-wings at him? Go ahead. Send a whole battalion to the planet? Do it. None of that matters. Darth Vader will still make it feel like an unfair fight and he doesn't need a rousing speech from Mel Gibson to rise to the occasion.

While Darth Vader's imposing tenacity is the main driving force of the story, the rest of the classic Star Wars cast play critical roles as well. Fittingly enough, it's Luke who delivers the shot that downs Darth Vader while the rest of his squadron act as glorified target practice. Princess Leia and Han Solo get involved as well once word gets out that the Rebels have a chance to take down Darth Vader. With the destruction of Alderan still fresh in Leia's memory, it's a given that she's every bit as motivated as Vader. It once again shows that being excessively motivated runs deep in the Skywalker family.

At no point does the pace slow down. At no point does the danger stop escalating. Even after Darth Vader crashes on Vorgas Vas, he keeps fighting. The Rebels have X-wings, troops, and tanks. Darth Vader has only a light sabre. And yet it still feels as fair a fight as anyone can hope to have against Darth Vader. In many respects, that is the greatest accomplishment of Star Wars Vader Down #1. It doesn't just invert every major Die Hard theme. It puts Darth Vader in a position where he has to show just how menacing he is.

There are times when you'll feel inclined to root for the rebels. There are times when you'll feel inclined to root for Darth Vader. But it never feels conflicted or forced. This isn't a matter of rooting for Jason Vorhees or against a virgin teenage girl. This is just a different kind of epic Star Wars battle. It might not involve a Death Star, but it feels every bit as epic and won't be decided by some obscure design flaw.

Final Score: 10 out of 10

Covert Subversion: Darth Vader #11

The following is my review of Darth Vader #11, which was posted on PopMatters.com.

Most people learn about dramatic irony in high school English classes, albeit only by reading novels and plays that no teenager has willingly read since the 1830s. It's an important storytelling tool. It puts the reader in a position to understand the context of a story in a way that isn't possible for any of the characters, unless one of those characters happens to be Deadpool. By knowing what the characters can't know or having already seen the sequel, the story takes on a new meaning. It can either enhance the subsequent stories or make them more needlessly complicated than the plot of the last Matrix movie.

Kieron Gillen has been attempting to accomplish the former and avoid the latter in Marvel's Darth Vader series. And by nearly every measure, he has succeeded. In fact, he's succeeded in measures nobody has expected.

He doesn't expect the readers to rely the events of the Empire Strikes Back and Return of the Jedi, two movies that have been effectively spoiled since 1983. He actually attempts to build a comprehensive story about Darth Vader in wake of the Death Star's destruction. And he does it in a way that somehow makes Vader even more menacing. Even James Earl Jones' voice might not do justice to the persona he's crafted.

More than anything else, Kieron Gillen's work on Darth Vader has crafted a story that laid the seeds for the events in Return of the Jedi. He succeeds where Revenge of the Sith failed so spectacularly in that he's made Darth Vader more than the emperor's puppet. He's shown that unlike the character Hayden Christiansen played in the movies, Darth Vader is capable of following his own agenda. And he's been doing so with help from a cast of surprisingly compelling characters in Aphra, BT, and Triple-0. But in Darth Vader #11, this agenda begins to clash with that of the emperor. Something has to give and it can't give until Luke loses a hand and Han takes a carbonite bath.

This means the story has to unfold in a careful, tactful way. That's not easy to do in a story that involves Darth Vader, an army of Stormtroopers, and a less-than-ethical archaeologist like Aphra. But somehow, Gillen manages to navigate this fragile narrative with the skill of a brain surgeon. He's very careful to mix in details that will later show up in the Empire Strikes Back, but not to the point that it would trigger another Han/Greedo situation.

This kind of attention to detail is refreshing in an era where continuity gaffs and retcons happen every other Thursday. Gillen channels his inner Stanley Kubrick, making sure every major and minor detail is addressed. And he does this without creepy twins or Jack Nicholson. Even with all these details, he still finds a way to include battles involving Stormtroopers, blasters, and light sabres. With no gungans or pod racers in sight, classic Star Wars fans will find plenty to enjoy.

But it's the use of dramatic irony that makes this story more satisfying than just seeing Stormtroopers get shot. This is where Thanoth, Darth Vader's new nemesis/ally, shows more competence than the average Imperial officer. Throughout this series, Vader has been subverting the Emperor, pursuing his own private agenda with Aphra. Being Darth Vader, he's made it look as easy as outsmarting Homer Simpson at times. That's no longer the case with Thanoth.

He's not Boba Fett. He's not Jar Jar Binks either. Thanoth is a Star Wars anomaly of sorts in that he's actually a competent bureaucrat. He's not content to just check out at five o'clock and count down the days until he can collect a pension. He sensed there was something not right about Darth Vader's latest covert mission and he's been investigating it, much to Vader's chagrin. It creates one of those situations where you know both of them can succeed without one of them being screwed over.

This marks the first time in this series where Darth Vader has to covertly help Aphra. He's only partially successful. This makes for some powerful moments where Vader is genuinely torn between his private agenda and his loyalty to the Emperor. Were he not Darth Vader, he might get nervous like Lance Armstrong during a drug test.

But the fact remains he is Darth Vader. He is the menacing Sith Lord that's destined to chop off Luke's hand and kill the Emperor. And his ability to pull this off under the watchful eye of someone like Thanoth is most impressive, even by Darth Vader's standards. He's very careful and covert in his ability to manipulate the battle. So he's not just a menacing Sith Lord with a light sabre. He's a menacing Sith Lord that knows how to use deception and tact.

These aren't just traits that neither Hayden Christiansen nor James Earl Jones can hope to capture. These are traits that add a complexity to Darth Vader that really didn't show until Return of the Jedi. The fact that Darth Vader is willing to go to such lengths to deceive the Emperor makes it more believable that he will eventually turn on him. Sure, it still takes the near-murder of his son, but it helps it feel less forced.

Darth Vader #11 acts as a culmination of sorts where Darth Vader's agenda finally clashes with that of the Emperor. It's a clash that's not quite on the level as the Battle of Hoth or the Battle of Endor. No planets blow up and nobody gets a hand chopped off. But it has all the necessary details. It conveys a refined, concise narrative that fits perfectly into the existing Star Wars mythos. And most importantly, it does this without gungans or Trade Federations.

Final Score: 9 out of 10

Star Wars: The Force Awakens Trailer (Official)

Every so often, there comes a story for which I don't need alcohol, weed, or any exotic substances to sufficiently convey the awesome it displays. It doesn't happen often, but when it does it's a thing of beauty. So with that in mind, I share the trailer for Star Wars: The Force Unleashed. Nuff said!

Epilogues and Prologues: Journey To Star Wars The Force Awakens Shattered Empire #1

The following is my review of Journey To Star Wars The Force Awakens Shattered Empire #1, which was posted on PopMatters.com.

The phrase, “Every new beginning comes from some other beginning’s end,” isn’t just a lyric to the only hit song Semisonic ever released. It’s the cornerstone of Disney’s strategy for expanding Star Wars beyond its iconic mythos and disappointing prequels. Not content with the billions of dollars that the Star Wars brand generated over several decades through six movies, Disney is betting that continuing the saga will yield even more billions. Everyone from George Lucas’ accountant to Disney’s top executives believes it’s a pretty safe bet.

But unlike a lotto ticket, Disney has the ability to guide Star Wars into this new era. They have the resources of the House of Mouse and the House of Ideas in Marvel to forge this new saga. But to date, the most Disney has done is create a trailer. Granted, that trailer nearly broke the internet with an outburst of fanboy squeals not seen since Carrie Fisher first put on a chain mail bikini. Even so, there’s still the matter of actually building this new era for a new generation, hoping that a new legion of fans will step forth and fork over enough money to build a new Death Star.

This is the process that Journey To Star Wars: The Force Awakens Shattered Empire #1 attempts to begin. It doesn’t explore the history of the Star Wars universe. It doesn’t expand on the time gaps in between the first six movies, which have already yielded great comics and a couple of hit cartoon series. It’s going to boldly go where no one has gone before, if that’s not too inappropriate a term. It’s going to explore the future of Star Wars, picking up right where Return of the Jedi left off.

It’s a bold move and one that might scare some fans who still have nightmares about Jar Jar Binks. Those fears, however, are mostly unfounded. This story that unfolds from the closing scenes of Return of the Jedi contains nothing that will blow up message boards or crash the internet. There aren’t any Han-or-Greedo moments that will have Star Wars fans arguing for decades. That said, there aren’t many moments that will inspire the same feelings as Luke blowing up the first Death Star.

This story doesn’t actually follow Luke Skywalker or Princess Leia or almost any of the now-iconic characters that made George Lucas obscenely rich. It follows the story of Shara Bey. She’s not a Gungan. She’s not a princess. She’s not some random bounty hunter either. She’s just one of the many hotshot pilots who took part of the attack on the second Death Star. However, it’s established early on that she’s not a faceless extra in a Walking Dead rerun. Her story is actually woven into Return of the Jedi.

She’s the one who helped Lando make the final attack on the second Death Star with the Millennium Falcon. She’s also the one who helped Luke Skywalker escape in an Imperial shuttle without getting shot down. So right off the bat, she establishes herself as a pretty important character. And there’s nothing she does that fundamentally changes or undermines the events of Return of the Jedi. It doesn’t try to be like the last Terminator movie and fundamentally change the whole setup. Instead, it tries to expand it.

This expansion is what gives the story appeal. However, that appeal has limited scope. While we do see Shara playing an important role in this iconic battle in the Star Wars mythos, we don’t see her do much else that’s really noteworthy. That’s not to say she just sits around and dances with Ewoks either. She does make an effort to distinguish herself and she’s able to do it without a light sabre.

As the story unfolds, we learn a few things about Shara. In addition to being a capable pilot, she’s also married to a fellow Rebel named Tuck. And for the most part, their relationship is as passionate as any that involves surviving Imperial tyranny. It’s not nearly the spectacle of Han Solo and Princess Leia. In fact, by comparison it’s downright bland. In some respects, it’s refreshing. Star Wars doesn’t need another romantic struggle at this point, especially if someone ends up frozen in carbonite again.

Refreshing as it is, Shara and Tuck don’t do anything that’ll inspire cos-players at a Star Wars themed wedding. They just share a quiet moment to establish that this is one of those marriages where the passion is genuine and not something Jabba the Hutt imposed. It’s a moment that really doesn’t have much relevance other than putting them in a position to help their fellow Rebels with a follow-up mission on Endor.

It’s a mission that basically reveals that killing the Emperor and destroying his oversized battle station isn’t enough to destroy an Empire. There are still people in this world that think the Civil War never ended. So it makes sense that there would be plenty of Imperial holdouts. It makes for some nice action. It’s not nearly as epic as the battle against the Death Star, but then again few things are.

There’s nothing inherently flawed with the narrative. There aren’t any major plot holes. Shara Bey isn’t going to remind anybody of Jar Jar Binks either. The story, as a whole, is solid and concise. However, there’s nothing about this story that’s really memorable or jarring. There are no shocking revelations. There aren’t even any hints as to how this ties into Star Wars: The Force Unleashed. If it were a college essay, Journey To Star Wars: The Force Awakens Shattered Empire #1would get a passing grade and nothing else.

This comic still offers a great deal of potential. Shara comes off as likable and compelling. The potential for battles against lingering Imperial forces also offers plenty of intrigue, but it fails to generate the kind of excitement that’ll start trending on Twitter. However, it does have a level of refinement that makes it a worthy supplement to Return of the Jedi. Princess Leia’s bikini will still be the most memorable part of that story, but every little detail helps.

Final Score: 6 out of 10

Scanned Thoughts: Journey To Star Wars: The Force Awakens Shattered Empire #1

This year is set to be the ultimate nirvana for Star Wars fans. This Christmas, at a time when we’re obsessing over sales and getting drunk off eggnog, it’s going to happen. A new Star Wars movie is going to be released. Not since the destruction of Alderan will so many voices collectively cry out at once. It’s a moment that fans and Disney accountants have been anticipating since Disney bought the Star Wars rights. It’s a new movie for a new era of the movie that redefined sci-fi, cinema, and incest overtones.

But before this most epic of holiday feasts can begin, Disney has tasked Marvel with wetting our appetites, as if Star Wars fans weren’t already gnawing on their arms like crack addicts in withdraw. To bridge the gap between Return of the Jedi and The Force Awakened, they’ve commissioned Marvel to craft Journey To Star Wars: The Force Awakens Shattered Empire #1. This series is supposed to set everything up so that those of us who fork over more money than others in our Star Wars fandom aren’t completely lost. It’s either meant to reward our loyalty or suck more money out of our wallets. I don’t care which is the case. If it’s awesome, my wallet can kiss my ass.

This journey to Star Wars: The Force Awakened begins at the end of the last journey in Return of the Jedi, which is entirely appropriate. We’ve all seen the epic saga, complete with implied incest. For those who haven’t seen it in a while, there’s a nice recap page that shows Luke’s showdown with Darth Vader and the battle against the second Death Star. However, the focus isn’t on Luke, Han, or Lando this time. Rather than tell us shit we already know, this story adds a new dimension to this familiar scene. Return of the Jedi is already a delicious cake. Why not add more frosting?

This new dimension has a name and a codename. Her name is Shara Bey and she’s Green Four of the Green Squadron, who were part of the epic space battle against the second Death Star. Lando and the Millennium Falcon are still there. But again, we already know how their story pans out. Shara’s the one who gets the focus. She’s among those who helps the Millennium Falcon make its epic run into the Death Star’s core. So in that context, she’s not fucking Jar Jar. She has a big fucking role in Star Wars right off the bat.

She’s still an unknown, but this is still a good way to establish her importance. She’s not a character who is just randomly thrown into the shit storm and expected not to stink. She actually has a role in a familiar scene. That’s a good way to tie her into the core fabric of the Star Wars universe. We still don’t know much about her or why we should give a shit about her, but we do know that she’s already contributed to the moments we know and love in a major way.

Once Lando and the Millennium Falcon start their run, Shara ends up contributing in another major way. Remember when Luke escaped the Death Star? Well, he was in an Imperial Shuttle and last I checked, those things are easy targets. So how the hell did he make it down to Endor without getting shot down? Well, the movie never revealed that, but we finally find out now over 30 years later. It was Shara who found out that Luke was on board. And she helped keep the other Rebels from blowing him out of the sky.

It’s one of those minor details from the movie that didn’t need to get expanded. Even if there were message boards in the mid-80s, I doubt Star Wars fans would’ve been wondering how Luke made it down to Endor without getting shot down. Then again, these are the same fans who bitch and moan about who shot first, Han or Greedo. So maybe I’m giving them too much credit. But at least for now, there’s no more reason to bitch. Shara Bey is the reason Luke made it down to Endor in one piece and for that, I think she’s earned the right to be awesome.

More familiar details follow. The events of the movie take over again and we see nothing that hasn’t been seen or parodied by Family Guy and Robot Chicken before. Lando completes his run with the Millennium Falcon, the second Death Star explodes, and the Rebels rejoice. Shara joins her fellow squad mates back at the base where everyone is either ready to celebrate or take a long, overdue nap. There are some solemn words about their fallen commanders, but everybody is more inclined to party their ass off. And why shouldn’t they? They just beat the Galactic Empire. Even an Amish republican would say they’ve earned it.

That’s exactly what Shara does. She joins her fellow rebels down on Endor where the fireworks are going off, the Ewoks are dancing, and George Lucas is counting his money. There are some familiar faces with C-3PO, Lando, Chewy, and Han Solo. But they don’t really say much beyond the post-victory dick-measuring. Even so, their presence alone helps give Shara’s story more weight. It shows it’s a story that’s intimately entwined with the events of Star Wars.

At the same time, however, I’m still not seeing much reason to give more fucks about her than the other characters we know and love. As nice as it is to revisit this scene, we don’t really see anything with Luke, Han, Leia, or anyone else. I get that this is Shara’s story, but it feels like these major characters that people probably care way more about are getting overlooked. We’re seeing Shara’s post-Return of the Jedi story, but why the fuck his hers more important?

That question doesn’t really get answered. It really can’t be answered because we still know jack shit about who Shara is. Well, we do get some additional details, some of which are more important than others. While the others are partying, she catches up with a few of her squad mates in an Ewok hut. That’s where she meets Tuck Dameron, who happens to be her husband. And no, there’s no implied incest with these two. They really are just a husband and wife who have spent a good chunk of their lives and their marriage beating the shit out of imperials. And I guess the couple that fights the Empire together stays together.

There are some nice romantic scenes with these two, establishing that this isn’t one of those marriages that happens in Las Vegas over a bet. It’s a real, actual marriage. It’s the kind the Kim Davis’ of the world don’t quite appreciate. They actually talk about what the future holds for them and whether it’s truly over. It’s sweet, but fairly bland. There’s nothing about this scene that hasn’t played out in a Twilight book, minus emo vampires.

Naturally, beating the Empire and celebrating their victory makes them very horny. So of course Shara and Tuck are going to enjoy a little victory nookie. Again, it’s pretty bland. There’s nothing in here that hasn’t been seen in every other PG-13 movie with Linda Hamilton in it. It just shows that Shara and Tuck are in a relationship where they enjoy doing the nasty in exotic locations like Endor. There are couples in this world that enjoy getting it on in dumpsters behind McDonald’s. Again, it’s downright tame. But it shows a nice bit of intimacy between the two.

However, they don’t even get to enjoy the post-victory afterglow before someone starts barking orders outside. This is officially beyond the credits of Return of the Jedi. The ghosts of Yoda, Obi Wan, and some asshole who looks like Hayden Christensen are gone. Now, we’re officially in uncharted territory with Star Wars. I want to be excited, but I can only do so much while following Shara’s story at this point. That or I took an extra valium and forgot. It’s entirely possible.

Once everyone gets dressed and hides the puke stains, they find out from Han Solo that destruction of a Galactic Empire isn’t exactly a clean and tidy process. They found out from Imperial transmissions that while most are fleeing with their dicks tucked between their legs, there are some holdouts. And some of them happen to be on Endor. They still think the Empire is equipped to fight back. I want to laugh at them, but there are still people in this country who don’t know that the Civil War has been over for over 150 years. So I can’t give Stormtroopers shit.

Having saved Luke Skywalker and banged her husband, Shara is in a good mood. So she volunteers to be the pilot that transports a strike team to this rebel holdout. Again, there’s not much here that’s really memorable. They have a chance to rub salt in the wound of a defeated Empire. Fuck yeah, they’re going to take it. But beyond that, we learn nothing more about Shara or anything about Luke, Leia, or Lando. It just seems like there are better shows in town.

That’s not to say it isn’t enjoyable. When Shara arrives with the strike team, we get a nice battle that we never saw in the movie. It’s the Rebels and Ewoks against a bunch of Imperial holdouts. It makes for some visually stunning scenes that feel like they might as well have been ripped from the movie. Shara doesn’t really do much other than provide air cover while Han leads the team below. And this is the only part of it that’s disappointing. Maybe I’m just more gay for Han Solo than I’m willing to admit, but I’d rather see him beating the shit out of Imperials than watch Shara casually observe the battle from a pilot’s seat. This is Star Wars, not fucking Top Gun.

While the battle has some nice visuals, it’s over very quickly. It’s not all that epic, nor should it be. The Rebels just destroyed another Death Star. Any subsequent battle isn’t going to be nearly as epic by default. Some things just can’t be properly followed up. Trevor Noah is going to find that out soon enough. But it’s a battle that does serve a purpose. Han and the strike team emerge from the base announcing that they found more intel and battle plans from the Imperials. Even though the Death Star has been destroyed, it’s not over yet. There are more battles to come, which is to be expected. Emperor Palpatine might have looked like an infected scrotum, but he wasn’t a fucking idiot. He ran his Empire like Steve Jobs on crystal meth. That means unlike a typical crack whore, it’s not going to go down easy.

This is one of those issues that doesn’t do anything wrong, but it doesn’t do anything exceedingly awesome either. If the point of this issue was to expand on the events of Return of the Jedi, it succeeded. And if the point was to introduce an intriguing new character in Shara Bey, it succeeded at least in part. But like a stoner who fixes a broken window with duct tape, it doesn’t do anything beyond that. Don’t get me wrong. I want to like Shara Bey. There’s nothing about here that I don’t like. I just don’t understand why I should give what few fucks I have to give when Han Solo, Princess Leia, and Luke Skywalker are present. Greg Rucka made a conscious effort to establish Shara Bey and post-Empire galaxy. I won’t say he failed, but I will say my panties are very dry right now.

There’s nothing about Journey To Star Wars: The Force Awakens Shattered Empire #1 that tempers my excitement for the upcoming movie. There’s nothing that makes me want to beat up Dr. Who and steal his Tardis in order to see it either. It certainly has the potential to be awesome. It already took the first step in setting up the conflicts of the post-Empire Galaxy. It just needed to take a few more for me to spare some extra fucks. I give Journey To Star Wars: The Force Awakens Shattered Empire #1 a 6 out of 10. It’s concise, clean, and coherent. I don’t have to sober up to enjoy it. But it still a ways from being awesome in a way befitting of the Force. Nuff said!