Batman Beyond #2 - Unfolding Awesome

The return to awesome continues with Batman Beyond #2. In my last review of the first issue, much of the enjoyment from the issue came simply from the fact that this is Batman freakin' Beyond! A comic a line we never thought we would hear from until someone slipped ruffies to Dan Dido and Bruce Timm and got them to sign off on it! Well now that the excitement from the first issue has worn off, the onus now falls in the book itself to carry it's own weight. It's been common among minis like this for writers to get lazy, thinking that just the title alone is enough to move the book. That's like thinking your dick is big just because your name is Dicksmash McIroncock. The label does not affect reality so there needs to be a little something called substance to back it up. Does Batman Beyond #2 have it? Well here's the scoop.

In the previous issue the new Batman, Terry McGinnis was investigating a string of murders that lead him to one of Batman's classic villains, Hush. Not surprisingly, Hush is supposed to be dead. Nobody gave Terry the memo though that death in comics is like the ethics committee in Congress. It's there, but nobody takes it seriously. At the end of the last issue, Hush got away. It's kind of lame they didn't show a bigger fight, but you get the sense they're saving that. No need to open the floodgates of awesome just yet. So Terry returns to the Batcave for another lecture by geezer version of Bruce Wayne.


Since Bruce hasn't gone senile quite yet, he gives Terry a brief history about Batman and Hush. Anybody who didn't read the Jeph Loeb story back in the day won't be at a disadvantage. Bruce is pretty darn extensive in the story about Hush.

In it's most condensed version Hush is/was Tommy Elliot, a childhood friend of Bruce who hated him with an insane passion because of the relationship he had with his parents. And by insane he doesn't mean filling his backpack with frogs as a prank. By insane he means he plotted to murder his own parents, take their inheritance, and exact his revenge. Bruce's father stopped that plan and Tommy's father survived. He went onto become a famous surgeon, hence the bandages he would later bear (apparently doing surgery when you're insane doesn't lead to the best results no matter what Nip Tuck says). Then he started hunting Bruce and that's how he became the crazed Batman villain that so many know and despise. What makes this description more awesome is that there's a lot of flashbacks to tie the past in with this present/future and that really fills in the extra details for the story. Considering the idea that lesser writers would probably not bother with those details, that puts this comic in a certain class already.


So Terry knows what he's up against. Bruce assumed that Hush was dead and that's like taking Larry Craig on his word on the cause of homosexuality. Terry may be young, but even he knows that Hush's death was probably a farce. Bruce still wants to do his detective work, but Terry's more of a 'hands-on' kind of guy so he goes right back to work. A killer is on the loose and the only detective tools he needs are his fists and a high powered suit. Factor in the suit and that doesn't make him seem nearly as tough though, but he still has other ways of proving it.


At this point the comic has too much talking and not enough blood so in the very next scene, there's finally some action in the here and now/future (yeah, I know that's confusing but cut me some slack. It's Batman Beyond). Another murder goes down. This time it's someone that fans of the show should recognize. In one episode there was a weapons maker known as The Armory. He wasn't the most memorable villain, but he had some big ass guns so that has to account for something right? Well apparently he was lame enough to kill with an umbrella. No, that's not a joke. He really was killed with an umbrella Penguin style.


So here's a new wrinkle to the murder mystery. The killer is now adopting old tactics of Batman's greatest hits. Terry isn't equipped to solve this so old man Wayne keeps working at it. Terry's job is to find the killer before he kills again. But before he can get back to finding clues, he comes across a new obstacle and it's one that may or may not have any bearing on this story: Catwoman. But not just any Catwoman. We're talking Catwoman Beyond here! Unfortunately, her future version seems to have developed an aversion to showing off cleavage so that costs her heavily even if she does have an awesome fucking suit.


Now normally Terry isn't too thrilled to be fighting a new villain, but seeing as how this is Catwoman he's not all that disappointed. If anything, he's stoked. Most of the assholes he fights are but ugly guys. Unless you're a blind Elton John clone, you're not going to see much appeal. But since Catwoman is a bad guy with an awesome rack, it takes some of the frustration away. While it's unlikely this woman isn't Selena Kyle (who at this point has boobs that sag to her knees), this Catwoman shows that she's every bit as skilled as her predecessor. She also looks pretty hot while doing it even though she shows no skin whatsoever (blasphemy in every Catwoman story).


This battle quickly becomes the biggest fight of the book. And why shouldn't it? Who would you rather see Terry fight? A crazed old man with bandages on his face or a hot ass chick in a skin tight body suit? If you chose the first option then you probably have some fetishes I don't even want to know about so I'll get my awesome from the Catwoman fight. This fight gets drawn out through the skies of Gotham and goes back and forth for a while. But as usual, Catwoman does not go quietly. Terry clearly has to learn that when fighting Catwoman, expect to have your balls busted to a certain degree.


So the hot chick gets away and Terry has to go back searching for clues. Yeah, it's a drag, but finding a killer is kind of important. He ends up investigating another old Batman foe, Julian Day, aka Calendar. In the annuls of Batman this guy is a C-lister on his good days and a D-lister on every other day. He looks like shit and he's got kind of a lame calling card, using days of the calendar to commit crimes. It's a pretty lousy tactic if you're trying not to get caught, but luckily he doesn't take up too much of the spotlight. As soon as Terry begins to question him, Hush enters the scene and another awesome fight unfolds.


It's not quite as awesome as the Batman/Catwoman fight (very few are), but it definitely holds it's own. It's a little less drawn out than the previous fight and doesn't end with any big revelations or clues. It just has Hush showing that the man can still hold his own and take on Batman, even in another era. He's pretty badass even if he still looks like a lamer version of Two-Face. The fight would have been even better if there were some more ominous hints dropped. But that doesn't happen. Hush just stands over Batman and says he's going to kill him. Yeah, that's about as shocking as Lindey Lohan's police record.


So I restate the question I posed earlier. Does this comic hold it's own now that it can't rely on the novelty factor that the first issue had? The answer is yes...for the most part. Now where does that 'for the most part' come in? Well even though this issue moves the story forward and has some pretty awesome scenes with Hush and Catwoman, there isn't a lot of flow to it. The fights and the scenes are kind of choppy. As great as the Catwoman fight was, what does it have to do with the murders? It may be the case she's involved somehow, but there weren't any clues to indicate as such. It comes off as something that was copied and pasted into the book because the editors thought "Wait a minute...let's have Batman fight a hot chick for once! That will sell more books!" This lack of connection does hurt the book, but doesn't kill it in the slightest. It just doesn't keep the flow of awesome coming.

However, the awesome is still great enough to make this book worth picking up. Anybody who likes old school Batman comics or is a fan of Batman Beyond that has been in withdrawal for the past five years would have to have extensive brain damage to avoid picking up this comic. It's creating an intriguing story and now that it has Catwoman in it, fans have no excuse. So Batman Beyond #2 gets a final score of 4.5 out of 5 and a solid thumbs up. In terms of Batman minis, and there have been many over the years, this one is worth it's weight in kryptonite. Nuff said!

Batman Beyond #1 - Future Awesome in the Present

There comes a time in every fanboy's life when they learn to accept that certain series are over and done with. They end sometimes abruptly, sometimes with a proper send-off and sometimes in a horrific act of destruction (Ultimatum comes to mind and kills a few more brain cells). Other times it's just flat out canceled. But whatever the reason, it's something you come to accept.

Batman Beyond was one of those series that was awesome in it's own right. The cartoon was an intense reworking of everything Batman and the future world of Gotham took on it's own unique light. The story thrived for a while, but it didn't prosper into something ongoing. So when it got canceled it pretty much faded, making only occasional appearances in shows like Static Shock and Justice League Unlimited.. Then DC drops a bombshell. It's bringing Terry McGinnis back into the DC universe.

For any fans of the old show it was like a beautiful supermodel knocking on your bedroom door and asking if it would be alright for her to lick melted chocolate off your dick while she stripped naked to the Dark Knight soundtrack. It came out of nowhere, but in a good way for once. Batman Beyond was a story that had it's own style and even in the diverse DC comic universe, it sets itself apart with it's unique brand of Batman meets Back to the Future. Now readers get a chance to see a full fledged story arc staring Terry McGinnis, Ace the dog, and a grumpy old Bruce Wayne. If that premise alone doesn't give Batman fans a boner, then they need to burn their copy of "The Killing Joke" and hold their heads low in shame.

Batman Beyond #1 is the first issue of this story by Adam Beechen. It starts off as if Batman Beyond was never canceled. There's no ink wasted on an origins story or some bullshit recap page. It gets right into the action and like many problems in the DCU, it starts at a lab for Project Cadmus in the heart of Neo-Gotham (that's another thing, for some reason Gotham decided to add Neo. Probably to sound cool or leech off the popularity of the Matrix, who knows?). An old foe has escaped their custody and is leaving a trail of bloody bodies in his wake. It's the kind of gruesome mystery that works just as well for Batman in the future as it does in the present.


While this is unfolding, Terry McGinnis is hard at work being the new Batman. He's caught up in a battle with his old foe, Spellbinder. Anybody who has seen the old show should remember him. He's the deranged school counselor who heard one too many students bitch about how hard homework was and went crazy, turning into a psychopathic villain who got his kicks casting illusions on people. He's basically the modern day equivalent Jonathan Edwards only not nearly as big a douche.


The fight between Spellbinder and Batman isn't taken lightly. It's a pretty extensive fight that's drawn out over the course of several pages. For a character that's been out of the picture for the past five years, it's pretty refreshing. He hasn't lost his touch and the writers aren't just relying on the novel nature of this comic to make it work. There isn't just action. There's some nice witty exchange between Bruce and Terry. Even though Terry has clearly been doing this for a while, he's still somewhat of a punk and Bruce is still trying to work the kinks out. For a guy his age, that can't be good for his health (as if he ever gave two shits for his own regard to begin with).

But even after the fight is over and Batman wins, there are some interesting developments that help show that this book is still tied to the greater DC universe at large. Micron, the future version of Captain Atom, shows up and offers Batman another chance to join the Justice League. Again, there's some reference to the old show here. There was an episode where Terry did get a chance to party with the big boys and party quite hard at that. However, just like his predecessor he doesn't work well in a team. He prefers to stay a solo act that works locally rather than flying off to some distant star system to save some pocket race of aliens who live on a planet wedged between a black hole and a pulsar whose mating rituals involve giving the finger to passing races of female warriors while they're on their period. So he tells Micron no and isn't very polite about it either. That's Batman for you. Terry still carries the mantel well after his brief affair with a mistress called cancellation.


While the superheroes are talking politics, the escaped killer is having an orgy of fun. He managed to steal some clothes Kyle Reese from Terminator style and slip into the safety of the crowd. That's really all he needs to get back to doing what he does best and what he does best appears to involve butchering people with surgical gear in a way that would make the guys from Nip Tuck castrate themselves. It's another gruesome scene that never would have made it past those pussies in the Parent TV Council for the cartoon. Seeing it in a comic like this just looks and feels so good. Take that Christian Conservatives!


We then get a glimpse of the Batcave and a visibly aged Bruce Wayne. The man has aged about as well as a mix of fine wine and milk. Here the dynamic between Terry and Bruce continues. Bruce is still conditioning him in many ways to be the Batman that Gotham needs. Terry's immaturity shows once again when he talks about that alien concept known as sleep. A real Batman knows that sleep is not in the vocabulary and he learns that the hard way when Bruce detects reports of the murders, thus finally tying this plot with the escaped Cadmus nutjob with the new Batman. Knowing full well it's not possible to say no to the cape, Terry suits up again and heads out to investigate.


What follows is more classic elements of a Batman detective story. Terry heads off to investigate the murders and some of the cool gadgets of the new bat suit, like for instance the microphones in the fingertips, come to light. It sure beats using the old utility belt. Bruce goes down the possibilities. The killer seems to be messing up peoples' faces without going through the usual routine of robbing their ass. It shows they're dealing with a psycho and not a thief with impulse control issues. The list of who it could be is short. Twoface's name is dropped and since Bruce mentions no body being found, common comic book physics take over. We all know the story. No body means the guy ain't dead. So the intrigue only grows.


The next stop is St. James Psych Ward, which is where all the old patients from Arkham got shipped to. Among those still breathing is Jervis Tech, the Mad Hatter. Batman pays the guy a visit only to find that his mind has turned to the consistency of armpit sweat. They guy has clearly warped the minds of one too many victims including his own. So there's not much questioning to be done unless they want to hear fairy tells as told by Charles Manson.

Lucky for Batman, the next clue comes to him. A nurse screams and Batman goes to save her. He arrives to only catch a brief glimpse of the figure running away, who for whatever twisted reason doesn't want to take a shot at Batman yet (probably wanting to brush up on his psycho as a show of mutual respect. All major villains have standards too, you know). Terry goes onto help the nurse, who is obviously traumatized and in need of more therapy than Opera and Dr. Phil can possibly provide. But she's still sane enough to drop an ominous clue as to who is behind this. It's best summed up in one word...Hush.


And wouldn't you know it? The comic ends here on this dandy of a cliffhanger. That's right, readers are left thinking "Are you fucking kidding me?! Instead something tried and overused like Spellbinder or the Jokers they go with something more novel like Hush? How dare they!" I'm shocked and appalled as well. Batman Hush was one of the most acclaimed Batman stories of the past decade and the possibility of it translating into Batman Beyond is just too awesome for words. They could have easily just tried rehashing some old plot from the show, but they didn't. They did something new and fresh and if that isn't enough to rekindle that latent Batman Beyond fan in you, then you're just being a dick.

This comic is awesome. Seeing Terry McGinnis back in action is a real treat. Seeing him back in action in a story that's engaging, novel, yet still contains all the elements that make Batman great only adds icing atop a strippers tits to make it better. It's not without some flaws. The biggest shortcoming of this comic isn't small enough to discount unfortunately. As great as the story and premise is, the art really doesn't measure up. The lines are weak, the coloring is bland, and the environment of Neo-Gotham just doesn't impress in the slightest. It would be perfect if there was some visual awe to go along with the awesome plot. Sadly, your eyes won't be in for a treat so you'll have to make due with the plot.

But since it's still such a strong story with Batman Beyond no less, the comic still gets a 4.5 out of 5. My love for Batman Beyond has officially been brought back from the dead and it is hungry for more awesome! This series has been a long time coming, but it was worth the wait. Nuff said.