The Red Queen Chronicles: The Lost Son Chapter 4 is LIVE!

There are some characters whose sexiness is overtly powerful. Nobody questions the sex appeal of characters like Mary Jane Watson, Emma Frost, or Daken. They're all pretty open when it comes to showing off their sexy side. It's part of their persona and their allure. It's a big reason why I've had so much fun writing my "Red Queen" series.

Then, there are characters whose sex appeal is understated, but overwhelming. They don't carry themselves as overly sexual. They may even come off as reserved or even most of the time. However, when you dig just a little deeper into their personality, you find that they have an immense capacity for sexiness. Most of the time, it goes unrealized. It usually takes a mix of incentives and a nudge, here and there, to help them embrace it.

That's exactly what I've done with Jean Grey in the world of the "Red Queen." When she first arrived on the scene in "The Red Queen Chronicles: The Phoenix," she was tense and conflicted. Thanks to some "coaxing" from Mary Jane and Emma Frost, she opened up in more ways than one, including the sexy ways. She and Cyclops have since expanded their relationship and their sexuality, embracing new opportunities and new lovers.

She has had to tap into that sexual potential even more throughout "The Red Queen Chronicles: The Lost Son." It has even put her into conflict with Daken, Logan's long lost son who is a bit more direct with his sexual proclivities. It led to a clash that left things a bit unfinished between them, to say the least. Now, with the final chapter of this latest sexy side-project, she and Daken will have a chance to tie up loose ends and in the sexiest way possible.

The Red Queen Chronicles: The Lost Son

Chapter 4: Balancing Act

I hope you've enjoyed this colorful story of devious plots and villainous decadence. I had a lot of fun writing it and to those who sent me so much kind feedback, I sincerely thank you. A few very kind reviewers even helped me flesh out ideas for this story. You know who you are and I can't thank you enough. This story actually got more support than I expected. Apparently, stories about Jean Grey's hidden sexy side have a lot of appeal. Who knew? That's good to know and hopefully, it'll inspire other sexy stories. Nuff said!

The Red Queen Chronicles: The Lost Son Part 3 is LIVE!

Whenever I plan one of my sexy side-projects, I'm never quite sure whether it'll generate the kind of reaction I hope for. Most of the time, I'm just grateful that it generates any reaction at all. I've done projects that I thought were sexy as hell, but didn't get a single comment. Thankfully, "The Red Queen Chronicles" hasn't been one of them and the response to "The Red Queen Chronicles: The Lost Son," has done plenty to exceed my expectations.

The previous chapter, especially, garnered a lot of positive comments. Who knew that a scenario involving Daken and Jean getting extra rough with each other would be received so well? I know that sounds obvious in hindsight, but I was genuinely astonished by how much people responded to that scene. It gives me high hopes for some of the other sexy moments I have planned in this story.

It's not over. There's still plenty of action left, sexy and otherwise. Jean may have "subdued" Daken, but there's still the matter of Romulus and a pheromone-controlled Wolverine to deal with. It's going to get rough, messy, and sexy before all is said and done. I only hope the events in this latest chapter are just as satisfying to those who enjoyed the last one. Also, to those who left such wonderful comments, I sincerely thank you.

The Red Queen Chronicles: The Lost Son

Chapter 3: Carnal and Cunning

I can confirm that there will be one more chapter in this story. I can also confirm that this chapter will involve Daken so rest assured, I'm not done utilizing his sex appeal. For reasons that are now painfully obvious, his unique sex appeal has really resonated and I hope to make the most of it in this story. Nuff said!

The Red Queen Chronicles: The Lost Son Part 2 is LIVE!

I know waiting sucks, especially when you're waiting for something sexy. People tend to get impatient when they're horny. That's just an inescapable fact. I knew when I began writing "The Red Queen Chronicles: The Lost Son" that it was going to take multiple chapters to both tell the story and maximize the sex appeal. I also knew that the process would require some lengthy waiting for those eager to see Daken enter this sexy world I've created.

To those loyal and passionate readers, I apologize. I know the wait has been difficult. You have been extra vocal with your feedback on the first chapter. It ended up being more feedback than I expected. Apparently, the promise of Daken taking part in a story that involves Jean Grey, Emma Frost, and Mary Jane Watson has people extra excited. I want to say I'm surprised, but just typing that out makes it too obvious.

I understand the first chapter was somewhat shorter than usual and it really left things on a cliffhanger. Again, I apologize, but I have every intention of making that wait worthwhile. This latest chapter is going to have plenty of juicy content that was worth the extra time and effort. Yes, I know that's a kinky choice of words, given the nature of these stories. No, I'm not apologizing for that.

This latest chapter contains a few details and themes that multiple readers have asked about in the past. To those readers, I hope this delivers. Now, some of them are a bit darker than usual. However, I made an effort to not let it get too dark. It's a challenge to balance out the sexiness with the serious overtones. I think I've achieved that here.

The Red Queen Chronicles: The Lost Son

Chapter 2: Dangerous Games

This chapter really raises the stakes and steps up the sexier themes of this story. There's still more to come, though. There are a couple more chapters in the works, each containing more juicy content of the kinky variety. I know the wait won't be easy, but I intend to make it worthwhile. Thanks again to all those who have supported this story. I hope you feel your patience has been rewarded.

Red Queen Chronicles: The Lost Son Chapter 1 is LIVE!

When it comes to sexy side-projects, some ideas are difficult to work into a story that's both sexy and compelling. It's one of the things I struggle with most in crafting these stories. On the flip-side, there are also some ideas that work a little too well because of their inherent sex appeal. It doesn't seem like a problem, but it can be. An idea that's just that sexy can sometimes make maximizing the story a real challenge.

Daken is one of those rare characters who embodies that idea to the letter. It's not just that he's unapologetic in how he exercises his sexuality. He will literally fuck anyone and anything for any reason. Since he also happens to be Wolverine's son, complete with his healing factor and all the sexy benefits that come with that, he actually can fuck on a level that elevates his sex appeal into uncharted territory. In a world that still has characters like Emma Frost and Mary Jane Watson, that's saying something.

Shortly after I finished, "The Red Queen Chronicles: The Phoenix," one of the most frequent requests I got from readers was to bring Daken into this story. In a world where Jean Grey is uninhibited sexually, there are just too many reasons that appeals. I certainly don't deny that and I had many long conversations with passionate readers on the subject. The challenge was crafting the right story to ensure maximum sex appeal.

After working long and hard, including a few setbacks along the way, I feel like I've finally found that story and I'm ready to tell it. I'm ready to bring Daken into the world of the Red Queen. It's not a story that I can tell within a one-shot or just two chapters. This is one of those stories that needs to be a bit longer to contain all the sexiness. It's hard work, but worth the effort and the first chapter should help set the tone.

The Red Queen Chronicles: The Lost Son

Chapter 1: Surprise Reunion

I hope that gets everyone excited for this story, in more ways than one. I've yet to decide how many chapters this will be. It depends on how the events I've planned play out. Rest assured, though, there will be plenty of sexiness to go around. That I can promise you. Nuff said!

Next Sexy Side-Project: Enter Daken!

Every now and then, a character comes along who is just destined to find his or her way into one of my sexy side-projects. It may not happen immediately, but at some point, it's a given that it will happen. Of the many characters who have come along over the past couple decades, only a handful of characters fit that profile. At the top of that list is Daken Akihiro, also known as the son of Wolverine.

When he first showed up in the pages of Wolverine Origins, I didn't know what to make of him. I didn't even know if he would be a successful character. For all I knew, he was a Skrull agent, a failed clone, or Mystique in disguise. Failed comic book characters are notorious for disappearing inexplicably or being retconned into oblivion. Daken escaped that fate and it wasn't long before I realized that he would one day make it onto my sexy stories.

Like his father, Daken is a very sexual creature. In fact, he's probably a lot more sexual than his father and not just because he's confident enough to sport a mohawk without being in an 70s punk band. Where as Wolverine reserves his sexual energy for sexy redheads, African goddesses, and cute Asian women, Daken will fuck anyone or anything. The man is durable, reckless, egotistical, and not afraid to use his penis and his claws to win a battle.

It was never a matter of if I would incorporate Daken into a sexy side-project. It was only a matter of when. Well, that time is almost upon us. He's already an unapologetic sex fiend in the comics. That means he'll fit seamlessly into the world of the Red Queen. For someone with his capacity for deviance, though, a one-shot just isn't enough. That's why I'll be bringing him in with a multi-part story, one that's sure to raise the bar for sexiness in the Red Queen's world.

The story will be entitled "The Red Queen Chronicles: The Lost Son." I don't know yet how many chapters it will end up being, but the first one will come out three weeks from today. It will build on some of the plots I've crafted in previous stories, but I want this one to stand on its own, primarily to give Daken plenty of room to work his deviance. If you're a fan of Daken and his knack for being sexually flexible, you won't want to miss this. It all starts in three weeks. See you then!

Sexy Side-Project "The Red Queen Chronicles: The Holidays" is LIVE!

It's that time of year again. Decorations are going up, eggnog is on sale, and department stores are on their knees, begging people to come buy their crap. That's right. The holidays are here! If you don't care for the holidays, then I weep for your soul.

I, for one, love the holidays. I love everything about it from the shopping to the family moments to the peppermint lattes spiked with whiskey. I don't care that it has become so consumer-driven that Santa Claus may as well be a secret agent for Amazon. It's still a wonderful time of the year that evokes all sorts of wonderful experiences.

That brings me to my latest sexy side-project. Yes, I realize that was a poor transition on my part, but how else do you lead into project that combines sex appeal and the holidays? Moreover, how do you lead into it when that sex appeal also combines the sexiness of Jean Grey, Emma Frost, and Mary Jane Watson? Even Ebenezer Scrooge, himself, would be inspired by that.

Maybe it's just my overactive holiday spirit, but I felt compelled to make my next sexy side-project holiday themed. Since the world of The Red Queen is already so rich with sexiness, I used that to set it up. Given how much that world has grown this past year, I can think of few worlds better to celebrate the holidays in the sexiest way possible. Enjoy!

The Red Queen Chronicles: The Holidays

As always, I encourage everyone to provide feedback. I'm still not done with this world. I still keep getting new, sexy ideas that I can't resist pursuing. I'm still undecided on many, but I'm always open to discuss new ideas, especially the sexy kind.

If nothing else, I hope this story gets you in the holiday spirit, among other things. In case this is the last sexy side-project of the year, I want to thank everyone for helping me make this series such a success. I had no idea it would blossom like it has, but I'm so glad it did and I look forward to building more sexiness on top of it in 2018.

Wars of Hearts, Minds, and Psychics: Jean Grey #8

The following is my review of Jean Grey #8, which was posted on PopMatters.com.

In a perfect world, a friendly rivalry brings out the best and worst of two characters. Since no world is perfect, especially one that has Loki and shape-shifting aliens in it, that kind of friendliness is next to impossible. In the Marvel universe, rivalries between heroes and villains are widespread, common, and a vital part of its mythos. There isn't too much complexity in the sense that the dynamics are fairly clear-cut. The two characters are on opposing sides. They hate each other and want their side to triumph. Anyone who watches professional wrestling can understand that.

It's only when two heroes develop a rivalry that the narrative gains a layer of dynamics that can't be fleshed out by seeing Captain America fight the Red Skull for the billionth time. These rivalries often pit two characters who are on the same side against each other, sometime to the point where they undermine their own heroic efforts. For Jean Grey and Emma Frost, that point is far behind them and they've long since entered uncharted territory of bitterness.

These aren't just two characters who occasionally disagree with how to conduct themselves as superheroes. These are two characters who have actually hurt each other, physically and emotionally, on multiple levels. Going back to the early days of the Phoenix Saga during Chris Claremont's run on Uncanny X-men to Grant Morrison's run on New X-men, these two have a long and varied list of reasons to hate each other.

Even though Jean Grey ends up dead, there's a sense that these two are destined to clash again. With Jean Grey #8, the beginning of the Psych War arc, the wait is finally over. Dennis Hopeless pits a teenage, time-displaced Jean Grey against Emma Frost at a time when she shows little hesitation in sparking wars between the X-men and Inhumans. It may not involve the same dramatic elements that Morrison or Claremont utilized, but the stakes feel every bit as high.

From the beginning, Jean Grey #8 follows similar themes that Hopeless has established in previous issues. The time-displaced Jean Grey, in her effort to prepare for the Phoenix Force, finds herself in a situation she's completely unprepared to handle. Her being a teenager gives her a pass to some extent, but that only goes so far when the stakes are cosmic and the egos involved include Emma Frost. There's really no amount of preparation that can prepare anyone for that kind of struggle, regardless of how much time travel is involved.

In a sense, Jean is in a unique position to offer commentary on the events that led to her most recent death. Her venture into the mind of Emma Frost, her future rival, sends her on an abridged journey through those moments, eventually culminating in a direct encounter with the former White Queen during a lurid, yet familiar situation. It's the context of that encounter, though, that establishes the stakes and the drama for the Psyche War arc.

It's a rare, but increasingly common theme throughout her solo series. The time-displaced Jean ventures into a world that's destined to kill her, but with a different set of perceptions, compared to her older self. While being an immature teenager does plenty to skew anyone's perceptions, it still has the advantage of lacking the baggage of the older Jean Grey that perished. That's an important factor for the Morrison-era X-men because that same baggage played a significant role in causing her death.

Hopeless doesn't ignore those factors as the time-displaced Jean traverses Emma's mind and the memorable moments from the world of New X-men. In a sense, that baggage takes form and substance with the ghost of the older Jean Grey. The previous issue establishes her presence with the teenage Jean and not in a very friendly way either. The two Jean Greys from two different eras are constantly at odds, arguing and yelling at one another in various moments that would strain anyone's mental health.

That constant clash, which becomes a lot more heated as they fight through Emma Frost's mind, establishes an important distinction for Psyche War and for Jean Grey's ongoing story, as a whole. The Jean Grey of the past is still very much at odds with the Jean Grey of the future and not just because she ends up dead. Even though both Jean Greys share the same goal in avoiding the fate of the Phoenix Force, they're not on the same page in terms of methods. If anything, they trip over one another in their conflicting efforts.

It raises the stakes in the ongoing struggle while also revealing how ill-prepared Jean Grey is for the challenge before her. It gives the impression that she has never had a true grasp of the Phoenix, despite her being its most iconic host, going back to the Claremont era. It also makes the role Emma Frost plays feel more personal, especially as it sets the stage for a more heated battle that won't just involve psychic attacks.

The situation, context, and tensions are all there for Jean Grey and Emma Frost. The journey to their clash never gets derailed or subverted. However, even with so many critical ingredients, the lack of heated drama leaves the overall story in Jean Grey #8 feeling muted. While it doesn't try to fight the entire battle between these intensely passionate characters all at once, it stops short of probing the open wounds between them.

They never berate each other over past failures. There's no heated exchange on how Emma affected Jean's marriage to Cyclops. There are all sorts of emotional sub-plots that didn't find their way into the conflict. While the door is left open for these sub-plots, the story still lacks the connecting emotions that give all its potent ingredients the necessary impact.

Psych War still has plenty of potential to make this latest clash between Jean Grey and Emma Frost as dramatic as it deserves to be. Jean Grey #8 is just the first step in that effort. These are two of the most powerful psychics in the Marvel universe and they just happen to have a long list of reasons to resent each other. Anything less than an omega-level clash just won't cut it.

Final Score: 6 out of 10

United, Divided, and Spited: Secret Empire United #1

The following is my review of Secret Empire United #1, which was posted on PopMatters.com.

Every tyrannical regime in history usually learns the hard way that governing people is hard. People are erratic, petty, melodramatic, greedy, and every other quality associated with Lex Luthor. United them under a common state, guiding them down what tyrannical leaders think is in their best interests, tends to morph into a prolonged test of unending frustration. In a world populated by mutants, Inhumans, and teenagers that build suits of armor from trash cans, even Captain America is prone to such frustration.

Secret Empire pulls back the proverbial curtain, revealing a conspiracy wrapped in an agenda sparked by a retcon. The biggest secret not related to Tony Stark's biological parents comes out. Captain America has been a secret Hydra agent the whole time and puts himself in a position to take over. He does so with an efficiency that would give hippies and tobacco lobbyists alike nightmares. Short of a grassy knoll, it has everything conspiracy theory enthusiasts could ever want.

However, taking over the world is actually the easy part. The fact it takes Hydra so long and requires a Cosmic Cube says a lot about their efficiency as an organization. It also doesn't bode well for their ability to actually manage what they conquer. The pages of Secret Empire are already setting the stage for a clash to overthrow Hydra's new favorite patriot. Secret Empire United #1 opens a new front in that battle, one that's sure to complicate Hydra's efforts.

Jim Zub and Ario Anindito go out of their way to create some real-world parallels, giving the new Hydra-dominated nation a bitter border dispute. Given the sheer breadth of Hydra's power and influence, there aren't many nations that could actually threaten it. However, a nation full of mutants run by both X-men and their former enemies definitely would give any nation pause, Hydra or otherwise.

New Tian is presented as Hydra's solution for managing a sizable population of super-powered mutants. It's a small, semi-sovereign state where mutants and mutants live in limited harmony. It's actually very limited because the catalyst for the story is basically a script in racially bias police, albeit the opposite of what mutants are used to. It's both fitting and relevant. It highlights issues that are plucked right from the news and hashtag movements. While it's sure to spark divisive political debates, complete with outrage on both sides, it establishes and important dynamic for the issue.

Given how fascist states usually deal with minorities, it's surprisingly pragmatic. The Hydra-affiliated Steve Rogers understands that going to war with mutants rarely works out for anyone. It often ends with heroes fighting heroes and at some point, cosmic forces get involved and Tony Stark will try to shoot it with an oversized gun. That's not good for the stability of any nation, fascist or otherwise.

It's not a perfect solution, but it creates the perfect setup for a story that effectively doubles down on the conspiracy dynamics that guide the narrative in Secret Empire. It's a gamble, but it pays off in a big, satisfying way in terms of actual substance. It's a story that involves secrets, real-world issues, a prison break, and a fight that includes Deadpool. By the ever-changing standards of Marvel, it checks more boxes than most.

At the heart of that story are secrets and agendas. Captain America wants his Hydra-led empire to succeed and he prefers to do it without going to war with mutants. Mutants also want to improve their lot in the world. They've lived most of their non-Hydra lives in constant fear of Sentinel attacks, racial bigotry, and living weapons programs. Under Hydra, they have a chance to live in a state where they're the majority and they get preferential treatment by the cops. Even if it means living in a world dominated by Hydra, it still counts as an upgrade to them.

However, they're still a minority that shares a border with a Hydra-run nation. If the history of the real and fictional world has shown anybody anything, it's that minorities and fascist regimes don't get along. It creates bitter disputes, fosters even greater racism, and even sparks full-blown world wars. As everyone learned in Avengers vs. X-men, a war with mutants has no real winners in the long run.

That backdrop in Secret Empire United #1 helps make the events that play out feel real and dramatic. It's not just that there are parallels to draw between the story and the news that plays out every day on social media. It's easier to relate to the high emotions involve. Seeing characters like Sunfire decry a fascist state or listening to Hydra's leadership rail on strengthening the border carries more dramatic weight.

There are so many other cases of one group of super-powered people whining about another. In fact, that makes up the vast majority of Marvel's major conflicts. Secret Empire United #1 stands out by providing a real, relevant context to the situation. While it may inspire more political whining on social media, it makes for a much more compelling story and in an era where almost anything can spark political whining, that's a fair price to pay.

A story that fosters that kind of dramatic weight is strong enough on concept alone. However, Zub and Anindito really overachieve by crafting a concise, action-packed narrative, complete with a satisfying twist at the end. It's not the kind of twist that involves Cosmic Cubes or deals with Mephisto either. It's just a resolution that feels so perfectly appropriate, given the context of the situation and the over-arching themes of Secret Empire.

By nearly every measure, Secret Empire United #1 exceeds the expectations usually associated with tie-in issues. It's not simply a shameless plug for a larger story that creates one too many holes. It tells the kind of story that offers just the right kind of impact for a specific kind of story. It's essentially a targeted narrative, one that hits its mark in all the right ways. That, in the grand scheme of things, is still worth inspiring more angry political rants.

Final Score: 9 out of 10

A (Not So) Bittersweet End: Inhumans vs. X-men #6

The following is my review of Inhumans vs. X-men #6, which was posted on PopMatters.com.

Most epic battles are epic because of the skirmishes that led up to it. Ideally, the tension grows and the stakes rise to set up a final showdown wherein both sides think they're Mario and neither side believes they're Bowser. This is what makes battles like Batman vs. Joker, Superman vs. Doomsday, and Deadpool vs. Short-Sighted Fox Producers so meaningful. It's also why the final showdown in Inhumans vs. X-men has everything working against it.

In the case of this latest clash between two superhero teams, the skirmishes are forgettable and the stakes as unbalanced as fight between Juggernaut and a sick puppy. From the events leading up to it, to the tie-in issues that try to add badly-needed depth, Inhumans vs. X-men fights an uphill battle that may as well be upside down. It tries to be epic. It tries to be balanced. It just doesn't have the style, substance, or setup to make it work. To be epic, at this point, would require Onslaught-level power and/or a deal with Mephisto.

Charles Soule and Jeff Lemire may not be willing to call Mephisto, but they still try to make the most of what they've got to work with, which isn't much. Through five issues, the tension is there. The drama is there. There's a genuine effort to mold the conflict into something that feels balanced on both sides.

With Inhumans vs. X-men #6, the proverbial shot clock is running out. The drama, tension, and every other concept that's lacking has to pay off. However, that payoff never arrives in full. It's not a total bust, but it doesn't feel like a worth-while investment either. It's an investment that the Tony Starks and Warren Buffetts of the world would never make in the first place, but it's not one of those investments that bankrupts either side.

The most that can be said about Inhumans vs. X-men #6 is that it ends the conflict. It ends in a way that doesn't make either side looks good. In fact, both sides come off as woefully inept. There are any number of opportunities to avoid or mitigate the conflict. These opportunities are either ignored, glossed over, or fumbled with comic ineptitude. It's an inherent flaw that has plagued the X-men/Inhuman conflict since before the event started and the final showdown that unfolds in this issue does little to resolve that.

That's not to say the conflict is completely without drama. Lemire and Soule do make a concerted effort to make Inhumans vs. X-men #6 feel personal for the characters. This is most apparent with Emma Frost and Medusa. These two characters are, arguably, the primary driving force of the conflict. What they do and the decisions they make help give the struggle the depth it needs to feel like more than just another superhero clash. At a time when superheroes are more likely to fight each other than aliens, killer robots, or Thanos, that's very important.

Medusa vs. Emma Frost doesn't have the same epic undertones elicited by Batman vs. Superman, Captain America vs. Iron Man, or even Wolverine vs. anybody who steals his beer. However, it still feels very personal. Emma Frost makes it personal. She blames the entire Inhuman race for killing Cyclops. She takes it upon herself to exact the kind of vengeance usually reserved for Wolverine. There's no doubting her dedication. At the same time, however, there's no denying the inherent flaw this creates.

In the end, it's also Emma Frost who makes the conflict feel so forced. The main driving force of the Inhuman/mutant clash is supposed to be the Terrigen Mists, which is poisoning mutants all over the world. That issue gets resolved with a level of ease that feels downright inane and not just because Moon Girl succeeds where Beast, Forge, and every genius mind in New Attilan fail. It ends up feeling like a secondary concern, a formality has to happen before Emma Frost can fight Medusa.

By making the Terrigen Mists so trivial, it underscores everything motivating the X-men in this conflict. On top of that, they don't even get to make the decision that eliminates the threat of the mists once and for all. The Inhumans are the ones that do that. As soon as Medusa finds out that the mists will make the world uninhabitable to mutants, she doesn't even hesitate. She jumps at the chance to remove the mists from the atmosphere.

There's no argument with Storm. There's no fight with Emma Frost. Old Man Logan doesn't even need to insult her. She just learns something that the X-men could've easily told her in a simple text message and does the right thing. It makes the entire Inhuman/mutant conflict seem hallow. The fact that all anyone had to do was tell Medusa that the mists were about to exterminate an entire species makes every struggle in Inhumans vs. X-men #6, personal or otherwise, seem unnecessary.

In the grand scheme of things, neither the Inhumans nor the X-men come off as winners in Inhumans vs. X-men. They don't come off as losers either. The X-men do achieve their goal. The Terrigen Mists are gone. Mutants no longer have to worry about being gassed to death. They don't even need the Scarlet Witch to lose her mind again or cast some fancy spell to make it happen. That means they don't have to live in demon realms anymore for their own safety.

The Inhumans don't come off as losers either. Thanks to Medusa's hard choices, they come off as heroic and understanding. They make a sacrifice to prevent genocide. It does come at a cost, but New Attilan is still intact. No Inhumans died or suffered horribly. There's nothing stopping them from thriving again, albeit under different circumstances. Compared to being gassed to death, those circumstances aren't too bad. In that sense, it's still abundantly clear which side has its movie rights owned by Disney and which side does not.

With respect to creating a meaningful superhero clash, Lemire and Soule just don't have the ingredients to make Inhumans vs. X-men as epic as others before it. The circumstances, drama, and character motivations just aren't there. They are still able to make the most of it. Some of the flaws are inescapable. Others are just ignored. In the end, the resolution just can't be as epic as it needs to be. No amount of psychic manipulation from Emma Frost can change that.

Final Score: 5 out of 10

Underwhelmingly Misguided Underdogs: Inhumans vs. X-men #3

The following is my review of Inhumans vs. X-men #3, which was posted on PopMatters.com.

In sports, people love cheering for the underdog. In nearly every major sports movie, this underdog spirit is as common as the elaborate training montage that everyone since Rocky Balboa tries to emulate. It's not that hard to set up an underdog in a fight. They usually face harsh, unforgiving circumstances that puts them at a clear disadvantage. Having them overcome these disadvantages is a powerful narrative that often plays out in superhero comics as well, including those that involve superheroes end up fighting each other.

With Inhumans vs. X-men, it's not quite as easy for one side of the conflict. One side is fighting to prevent an entire species from suffering a horrible, painful death. The other is fighting to protect the big green cloud that is spreading this death. It's easy to make the former the underdog, as this is the position they've been in many times since their inception. For the latter, however, it's akin to making Emma Frost seem modest.

The circumstances of Inhumans vs. X-men are exceedingly unbalanced and have played out as such since before the conflict began. The clock is now ticking for the X-men. If they don't do something about the Inhumans' sacred cloud, every mutant on the planet will die a terrible death. If the Inhumans were agents of Hydra or just some ordinary villains who got tired of using killer robots, this doesn't even need to be an underdog story. It can just be a typical X-men story.

Unfortunately, the other side's movie rights aren't owned by Fox and Marvel has a vested interest in making them underdogs. Inhumans vs. X-men #3 tries to accomplish this as the conflict reaches a critical turning point. It doesn't fail miserably, but it certainly doesn't succeed either. The plot moves forward. The conflict gains new complications. From a narrative standpoint, however, that's about all this issue accomplishes.

Charles Soule and Jeff Lemire already have an impossible task on their hands. They're attempting to tell a story about a conflict where one side is fighting for survival and one side is fighting to preserve their current situation. This isn't a passionate disagreement on the merits of proactive justice. This is one side trying to survive while one tries to preserve the status quo. There's simply no way for that conflict to carry the same drama as Civil War, Avengers vs. X-men, or even the infamous Clone Saga.

With Inhumans vs. X-men #3, though, the story avoids any effort at creating meaningful drama around the conflict. There seems to be this unspoken acceptance that such drama is impossible. That may be a byproduct of the messy circumstances surrounding the story, but it doesn't change the outcome. There's no emotional weight to give impact of the story. It tries to roar like the Hulk, but hits with the intensity of a feather duster.

The action won't get anyone's heart racing. It won't get anyone to stand up and cheer for one side over the other. The only thing Inhumans vs. X-men #3 accomplishes is moving the plot forward. Even in this context, however, that progress is limited because it requires the story to ignore many of those messy circumstances surrounding the conflict.

At this stage, the Inhuman royal family is down for the count. The X-men have them contained in Limbo, thereby giving them the time they need to destroy the Terrigen Mist that's poisoning their species. Them having the advantage and the most to lose creates this strange situation where seeing the younger Inhumans rally against them doesn't generate the sentiment that most would associate with underdogs. There's no iconic training montage or Captain America speech to inspire them. They just call up some of their allies on a cell phone and go from there.

That's really the extent of the Inhumans' recourse. With the royal family neutralized, they turn to the other younger Inhumans like Ms. Marvel, Moon Girl, and Quake for help. There's no depth or drama to enlisting them. They literally just call them up, they acknowledge the situation, and they start making preparations. They put as much effort into crafting a counter-strike as most people put into ordering a pizza. They call each other up and just like that, they're a team ready to strike back against the X-men.

In addition to this being extremely bland, there's no effort on the part of the younger Inhumans to understand the conflict. They just see that the X-men attacked New Attilan and that's it. There's no heated debate on what to do, how to do it, or even why they're doing it in the first place. They react the same way they would if Hydra attacked New Attilan and that just compounds the underlying problem with the Inhumans vs. X-men conflict.

There's no getting around the implications. These young, inexperienced Inhumans are not just fighting the X-men, some of which are close friends with characters like Ms. Marvel. They're fighting against a desperate group of people trying to save their species from extinction. If the young Inhumans succeed, that means that countless innocent mutants suffer and die. If they fail and the X-men succeed, then no one dies. The Inhumans will face some difficult new challenges, but again, it wouldn't require that anyone die. There's just no way to be underdogs in that situation.

If there is an effort on the part of Soule and Lemire in Inhumans vs. X-men #3, it falls short by a wide margin. That's not to say there isn't substance within the story. It does succeed in adding new complications to both sides. The Inhumans do manage to hinder the X-men's efforts to destroy the Terrigen Mist and are able to buy time for their side to recover from the initial attack. Again, unless someone is a die-hard Inhuman fan, it's hard to root for them.

The Inhumans still try to carry themselves as though they're the underdogs and have just taken a few devastating punches to the jaw. On the surface, and only on the surface, it works just enough to keep the sequence of events going. Dig just a little bit deeper and the unpleasant truth is still there. The Inhumans are still trying to stop another species from saving itself. If the most they have to lose is not being able to create new Inhumans in a way that murders innocent mutants, then they can't be underdogs. Carrying themselves as such is just dishonest, misguided, and downright insipid.

Final Score: 4 out of 10

The New Red Queen Chapter 5: Crowning Achievement is LIVE!

We’re almost there! I’ve been building it up. I’ve been exceedingly thorough with the foreplay. Now, it’s time for the final climax, the grand finale, and whatever other sexy metaphor your inner 13-year-old comes up with. The culmination of yet another sexy side project is finally here. After this, I imagine everyone is going to need a cold shower, a bag of ice, and an economics lecture by Ben Stein to cool down.

I’ve had a lot of fun telling this story, “The New Red Queen.” There’s just something about a sexy side-project involving Mary Jane Watson that’s inherently awesome. She’s a great character who also happens to be sexy as hell. I built a new persona in “Spider-Man and the Prostitute” and I expanded that persona here in “The New Red Queen.” I like to think I’ve laid the foundation for more sexiness down the line. For now, though, I’m content to cap it off in the most satisfying way possible.

The stage is already set. Peter Parker has both Mary Jane Watson and Emma Frost ready, eager, and horny as hell to celebrate this new phase for each of them. Mary Jane Watson is now poised to become the new Red Queen of the Hellfire Club. Now, she’ll have a chance to channel her sexiness through a powerful organization fueled by it. I couldn’t think of a better job for Mary Jane that didn’t involve push-up bras.

What will this mean for her? What will this mean for Spider-Man? What will it mean for Emma Frost in the Hellfire Club? That’s all about to come together, both literally and figuratively. Yes, that’s as immature as it sounds, but it’s also entirely appropriate for a story like this. It involves Mary Jane Watson maximizing her sex appeal with Emma Frost doing her part as well. How can it be anything else besides sexy as hell?

The New Red Queen

Chapter 5: Crowning Achievement

This is the last chapter in this particular story. For now, it’s the capstone on the story I began with “Spider-Man and the Prostitute.” However, the overwhelmingly positive response I’ve gotten for this story has given me more than a few ideas. I haven’t finalized those ideas, but I’m definitely interested in pursuing them. Do you want to see more from this series? Do you want to see more of an overtly sexy Mary Jane Watson as she runs the Hellfire Club? Maybe that’s a loaded question.

Whatever your sentiment, please let me know. Please take the time to review and send feedback. I’m always happy to hear from readers. This is a series that can definitely expand. Want to see Mary Jane Watson service other superheroes? Let me know! Share some ideas! The world can always use more of Mary Jane Watson’s sexiness. This story is just part of my contribution. Enjoy!

First Shots and Fatal Flaws: Inhumans vs. X-men #1

The following is my review of Inhumans vs. X-men #1, which was posted on PopMatters.com.

What does it take for a clash between two superhero teams to be interesting these days? That's an increasingly relevant question because modern comics, as well as the movies they inspire, have gotten to a point where heroes fight each other more often than they fight actual villains. It seems an entire generation of comic book fans and creators have read Mark Millar's Civil War and desperately want to recreate that success, much to Mr. Millar's chagrin.

Those efforts, and the desperation behind them, don't often yield results. In fact, in the decade since Civil War, it seems as though that one stunning success was lightning in a bottle and trying to capture it again is like keep up with a race between Flash and Quicksilver. It's a losing battle, but one that still inspires more superhero clashes.

Avengers vs. X-men went to great lengths to match the scope of Civil War, leading to mixed results at best. Inhumans vs. X-men, the latest attempt to make heroes fighting heroes compelling once more, can't go to those lengths or match that scope. In some ways, this is a good thing because it means that Charles Soule and Jeff Lemire, the writers who have been developing the Inhumans and X-men respectively, can't follow the same formula.

The ingredients this time are very different. This is not about proactive justice or superhero legislation. Inhumans vs. X-men is set up with the simplest of circumstances. One team's very existence threatens to destroy another. Now, it's no longer possible for both teams to occupy the same world and not just because of clashes involving movie rights. This clash finally manifests in Inhumans vs. X-men #1 and while there's a lot of plotting, there isn't much drama or impact. Mark Millar can probably sleep easy for now.

The story doesn't hit the ground running. It doesn't drag either. Lemire and Soule are very careful, if not too careful, to set up the internal politics guiding the X-men. Unlike the Inhumans royal family, they must deal with the grim prospect of either going to war, leaving the planet, or being gassed to death. The most the Inhumans have to worry about is being mildly inconvenienced by the prospect that they'll be responsible for purging the whole planet of mutants. That may upset those who work at Sentinel factories, the stakes for them aren't quite as high.

This is the inherent flaw of the underlying conflict in Inhumans vs. X-men and this flaw has plagued every story leading up to this one to some extent. The conflict tries to frame the situation as balanced. For one side, the Terrigen Mist is life. For the other, the mist is death. In principle, it makes for a balanced conflict. In practice, however, it highlights a disparity that undermines any drama this conflict tries to inspire.

This is where the mentality of Inhumans vs. X-men clashes with the actual mechanics of the conflict. Beast makes it clear to his fellow X-men that the mutant will die if they stay remain on a planet where the Terrigen Mist roams unencumbered. It's not a matter of preserving their culture or their way of life. It's a matter of avoiding a horrible, painful death and the extinction of an entire species.

For the Inhumans, the particulars of the conflict can't be less similar. They're not facing extinction. They're not facing the death of their people. At most, they're facing a major inconvenience in that the future of their species will face uncertainty. However, uncertainty is a far cry from dying a horrible death at the hands of a poison cloud. Given that there are mutants like Magneto, who have direct experience with the horrors of a minority being gassed to death, it ensures this conflict remains utterly unbalanced.

Now that's not to say that the Inhumans make no effort to aid the X-men. They do show that when they detect a mutant in the path of the Terrigen Mist, they will go out of their way to get that mutant to safety. The X-men even use this policy against them in instigating the conflict. However, their unwillingness to let anyone taint this cloud that is bringing so much death to a minority that has subject to one too many Sentinel attacks still makes the conflict feel unbalanced.

To their credit, Jeff Lemire and Charles Soule still make an effort to navigate the conflict in a way that demonstrates a certain level of substance. Leinil Yu's art skills also add a distinct style as well. They highlight the high emotions of certain characters, especially Emma Frost and Beast. It gives the sense that Inhumans Vs. X-men #1 is a seamless extension from the story that has been unfolding since Death of X.

Along with these emotions, there's a distinct attention to detail that other superhero clashes like Avengers vs. X-men lacked. There isn't just some elaborate rallying cry ripped from the Braveheart movie. The X-men don't just blindly attack the Inhumans. They actually employ some strategy, which is kind of important in any conflict that is likely to involve explosions. They single out powerful Inhumans like Black Bolt and Karnak. They find ways to neutralize them. There's no magic to it. There are no cosmic forces disrupting the story. It actually feels like a substantive conflict.

Inhumans vs. X-men #1 has all the basics of a superhero clash. It even has a few refinements here and there. However, it doesn't have enough to make the conflict feel balanced. The biggest flaw in the story has to do with the larger circumstances surrounding it. In following this story, it's still painfully obvious which franchise's movie rights aren't wholly owned by Marvel and Disney. This limits the impact. Nobody's heart will be racing here because it's too obvious which side has the most to gain.

Some flaws are inescapable. Whether or not these flaws will undermine the conflict remains to be seen. Lemire and Soule have an uphill battle ahead of them and they may only be able to go so far up that hill. At the end of the day, the conflict between the Inhumans and the X-men still comes off as uneven and petty. At the very least, it also means that Mark Millar's title as the last writer to craft a decent superhero clash is safe for now.

Final Score: 6 out of 10

X-men Supreme Issue 145: Proactive Regression Part 3 is LIVE!

Throughout the history of X-men Supreme, and the X-men comics in general, there are a number of decisions that always seem to haunt the X-men. In the comics, Jean Grey’s sacrifice during the events of the Phoenix Saga, Cyclops’ decision to form X-Force, and Charles Xavier faking his death to undermine his students’ trust comes to mind. Hard decisions are a bit part of the X-men mythos in general. In X-men Supreme, there have been more than a few such decisions.

Some have been fairly recent in X-men Supreme and the effects haven’t yet set in. One decision that is already having tangible consequences in this fanfiction series came from the Phoenix Force during the Outer Limits arc. In the final battle with D’ken, the Phoenix made a powerful sacrifice that greatly reduced its power levels, so much so that Jean Grey can barely feel it anymore. It’s one of those decisions that had to be made under the harshest of circumstances. Jean has already been agonizing over it in the Proactive Regression arc. The events surrounding it have only given her more reasons.

The Phoenix Force’s fateful decision means the X-men were somewhat under-powered when they entered their latest conflict with the Brotherhood of Mutants on Genosha. While the X-men have dealt with being undermanned and underpowered before in X-men Supreme, going all the way back to the Uprising and the Cambrian Explosion arc, they’ve never needed extra firepower more than they do now. X-men Supreme is on the cusp of a huge upheaval, one that will strain the X-men in ways they’ve yet to endure in this fanfiction series. It won’t involve clones or time travel, but the impact will be huge. It’ll affect the X-men, their allies, and even their enemies.

At the center of this upheaval in X-men Supreme is the Brotherhood of Mutants. While the X-men are set to make some difficult decisions, it’ll be the decisions of the Brotherhood that will trigger this upheaval. The side-effects Outer Limits arc pushed them to the brink. Havok and the Scarlet Witch are no longer willing to be diplomatic. They’ve been subject to one too many agendas from President Kelly, the Shi’ar, and the Mutant Liberation Front. The Natural Disorder arc had one of their own members, Avalanche, betray them and it cost them the life of Polaris. That means the conflict in Proactive Regression is personal in ways the X-men can’t get around.

Now, with the threat of a nuclear and a revitalized Mutant Liberation Front, the Brotherhood and the X-men will have some hard decisions to make. Those decisions are going to set the course for X-men Supreme moving forward. Make no mistake. Plenty of those decisions will come back to bite the X-men, the Brotherhood, and everyone in between. That makes the final issue of the Proactive Regression arc something that is not to be missed. The future of X-men Supreme, and the upheavals to come, begin here.

X-men Supreme Issue 145: Proactive Regression Part 3

Hard decisions and big consequences are a hallmark of X-men. They’re a big part of what defines the X-men mythos as a whole. It’s part of what makes the X-men so compelling. It’s one of the many features I’ve tried to incorporate into X-men Supreme. Given all the difficult decisions the X-men have made in the comics recently, going all the way back to Avengers vs. X-men, I feel it’s only fitting they face similar choices in X-men Supreme.

I sincerely hope that these choices bring out the best in this fanfiction series. I mean it when I say I want X-men Supreme to be as awesome as it possibly can. That’s why I encourage everyone to provide feedback for this fanfiction series at every turn, especially during critical moments like this. The events of this issue will have major ramifications in the near and distant future so please take the time to review. I want to know how X-men fans feel about these difficult decisions. Either post them directly in the issue or contact me directly. I’m always happy to chat. Until next time, take care and best wishes. Xcelsior!

Jack

X-men Supreme Issue 145: Proactive Regression Part 3 PREVIEW!

I hope everyone had a fun, filling Thanksgiving holiday because you’re going to need your appetite for X-men Supreme. This fanfiction series is nearing the world-shaking conclusion of X-men Supreme Volume 6: Liberation Decimation. The world of X-men has been significantly upended in the recent X-men comics with the death of Cyclops and the ongoing war with the Inhumans. Well, X-men Supreme is not going to resort to killing characters or warring with other heroes. Instead, this fanfiction series will upend the X-men in a very different way.

The X-men are still trying to undo the damage they did after they left the planet during the Outer Limits arc. They were gone for six weeks. In that time, Havok took on a greater leadership role in the Brotherhood of Mutants and the Mutant Liberation Front reared its ugly head again, thanks to Stryfe. This time, President Kelly and General Grimshaw are not willing to wait for the X-men to save the day. After all the damage the Mutant Liberation Front did under Toad, especially after the near-catastrophe they faced in the Natural Disorder arc, they’re prepared to resort to extremes.

The X-men are trying to do their part to stop this madness and preserve some semblance of peace, but they’re already facing major obstacles. Charles Xavier may have his legs back, thanks to the Shi’ar in the Outer Limits arc, but he’ll need more than his legs this time. He boldly, and foolishly, led a team of X-men to Genosha in hopes of talking sense into Havok and the Scarlet Witch. They were met with a cold, hostile welcome to say the least. The Brotherhood of Mutants have tried to work with Charles Xavier before. Their capacity to trust him and his X-men at this point is limited at best.

Moreover, they have good reasons not to trust the X-men. The X-men were the ones that encouraged Genosha to work with General Grimshaw and President Kelly. They helped foster a fragile peace in wake of Magneto’s hostile actions during the Cambrian Explosion and the Time Bomb arc. For a time, this peace worked. Under the Scarlet Witch’s leadership, Genosha used its alien Warlock technology as an economic bargaining chip to maintain peace. Then, a good chunk of that technology got destroyed thanks to the Starjammers in the Outer Limits arc.

Now, the peace is broken. There are no incentives for Genosha to get along with the rest of the world. President Kelly has no incentive to be reasonable with Genosha either. On top of it all, the Mutant Liberation Front is ready to shove both sides into a state of human/mutant war. They’ve hijacked a nuclear submarine, complete with nuclear weapons, and Stryfe is ready to use it. Somehow, Charles Xavier and his X-men need to find a way to stop this madness before it’s too late. The odds are against them, but the X-men do have a few tricks up their sleeve, as the conclusion to the Proactive Regression arc will reveal. As always, I’ve prepared a preview that should offer some tantalizing clues to that world-shaking conclusion.

“That’s enough, Xavier. You had your chance. They’re not buying it,” he said flatly.

“They were never even given a chance!” retorted Xavier, “I trusted you to be reasonable, Alex. I don’t think you even tried. Losing Lorna has left you an empty shell.”

“Don’t you dare bring her into this! You don’t understand! You never did!”

“I understand better than you think. That’s how I know you’re making the wrong decision. Even without my telepathy, I can see that you’ve lost all hope and your people will suffer because it.”

The Professor’s words struck deep. Havok’s expression tensed as he hid the pain and anger dwelling within. He was a bit rough with Xavier as he shoved him down the stairs from the stage. He was even rougher when he reached the ring of fire that surrounded his X-men. He forced Xavier onto his knees and stood over him. The rest of the Brotherhood joined him as he stood in triumph over the X-men.

“It doesn’t matter what you think of us, X-men,” said Havok sternly, “We gave you a chance to state your case and you blew it.”

“Some chance,” scoffed Cyclops, “You were never going to listen. You probably rehearsed this scenario at least a hundred times.”

“Shut up, brother! You don’t get to pass judgment this time!” spat Havok.

“Face it, Professor Xavier. Your methods are obsolete. The world changed too much while you were gone,” said the Scarlet Witch, “Now the Brotherhood will be the one to make decisions for our kind. Not the X-men.”

“Lucky for you, we’re not without mercy,” said Havok, “Since you’ll be on our turf when the bombs start going off, we’ll give you shelter. You’ll stay with us under a Warlock bunker and witness the beginning of a new fight.”

“I’d rather be locked in a cell with Toad and no air freshener,” said Iceman.

“I don’t care what you’d rather do! This is bigger than the X-men or the Brotherhood. This is a turning point for every mutant on this planet. Since you can’t fight, you’re going to be witnesses. You and everyone else that thought they could fight our battles for us!”

There was burning intent in the tone of Alex Summers. He put the X-men in the same position he had been in all his life. He made it so they had no power to decide their fate. He and the Brotherhood were prepared to drag them into the bunkers if they had to. This time, they would see just how wrong they were.

Just as the Brotherhood seemed ready to serve Xavier his ultimate humiliation, a strange shadow passed over them from above. Before they could look up, a series of metal blades reigned down and struck in the area between Havok and the Professor.

“Hey Brotherhood! Ready for a little air mail?” said the angry voice of Angel.

“I’m assuming you sods did something to piss me off so we can skip the small talk!” said an equally angry Psylocke, who was riding with Angel in his arms.

The Brotherhood was caught completely off guard. Angel swooped down at them at high speeds, leading with his metal wings and using them to ram Quicksilver and the Scarlet Witch. This sent them tumbling through the dirt, rendering them stunned. Psylocke rolled off as well, landing right behind Pyro and using her psionic blades to sever the fuel lines in his flame thrower. This caused the flames encircling Professor Xavier and the X-men to fade.

“Crikey! Please tell me we prepared for this!” exclaimed Pyro as his flames sputtered out.

“The X-men pulling a few dirty tricks? Isn’t that given?” said Havok, his frustration boiling over.

“Trust me! You’ve never seen a trick like this!” grinned Angel.

Havok tried to fire off an energy burst to take down Angel before he flew around for another attack. His aim was dead on, but he did not expect Angel to counter it so effectively. Using his wings as a shield, he was able to fully deflect the incoming blast. He directed it right towards Quentin Quere, who was preparing for a telepathic attack.

“I swear your brain will-AUGH!” was all Quentin got out before he was hit.

“Ooh, that’ll give him a hell of headache!” grinned Shadowcat.

“Angel. you couldn’t have picked a better time to dust off the old uniform,” said a jubilant Iceman as he and the others emerged from the dying flames.

“I see you worked some metal into your new attire as well,” commented Colossus.

“What? You think you’re the only one who can use metal to kick ass?” he said with newfound confidence.

Angel flew in lower again, causing Havok to stumble back as he fired another round of energy blasts. This gave Psylocke the room she needed to move in use her psionic blades to skillfully slice off the power-inhibiting collars. She started with Professor Xavier, knowing that having the world’s most powerful psychic back at full strength would be a major advantage. Blob seemed to understand this as well and tried to attack.

“Oh no you don’t! You’re not weaseling out of this, X-men!” roared Blob as he charged the two psychics.

“Professor, do you mind?” said Psylocke dryly, “I can smell his breath from here.”

“Now that their psychic is down, this will be considerably easier,” said the Professor.

I know these past few weeks have been hard on X-men fans. Between the events of Death of X and Inhumans vs. X-men, I understand a lot of X-men fans are upset or anxious about the future of the X-men. Well, it’s during these anxious times that I sincerely hope that the X-men Supreme fanfiction series can provide a reprieve of sorts. I want X-men Supreme to be an outlet for X-men fans that want a world where the X-men aren’t killing too many characters off-panel or resorting to time travel to fill the void. I want X-men Supreme to be a simple outlet of quality X-men stories for X-men fans of all types to enjoy.

To ensure that quality, it’s very important that I continue to get feedback. So please take the time to tell me what you think of X-men Supreme and help me make it as awesome as it deserves to be. Either post your comments directly in the issue or contact me directly. Either way is fine. Until next time, take care and best wishes. Xcelsior!

Jack

Setting Up An Ominous (And Overdue) Conflict: Inhumans vs. X-men #0

The following is my review of Inhumans vs. X-men #0, which was posted on PopMatters.com.

Some epic struggles need no setup or backstory. If the story involves a knight and a dragon, then it's usually fairly clear who must be slayed and who is doing the slaying. There is certainly a need to establish the setting for such a struggle. Sometimes that setting is as big a part of the story as the proverbial dragon-slaying. When it comes to the X-men and the Inhumans, the setting for a conflict is basically a formality at this point.

This is a setup that doesn't need to be belabored. The events of Death of X, as well as the various events that unfolded in the pages of Extraordinary X-men and Uncanny X-men, make it abundantly clear that these two teams are going to try and kill each other at some point. It's just a matter of when, where, in what circumstances, and how unbalanced it's going to be.

Since the conclusion of Secret Wars, the tension between the X-men and Inhumans is anything but balanced. Once side has the benefit of movie rights and an ongoing TV show. The other side's movie rights are being held hostage by a rival company who managed to help Josh Trank ruin his directing career. Logistically speaking, there's no way this conflict can ever be balanced.

Jeff Lemire and Charles Soule have an impossible task with the Inhumans vs. X-men event. With Inhumans vs. X-men #0, they can at least put the pieces in place on the proverbial chessboard. The first shot isn't fired. The first ultimatum isn't issued. Nobody from the X-men or Inhumans even starts trash talking one another on social media. However, the story makes clear that these two teams are on a collision course and Emma Frost has her foot on the gas petal.

In essence, Inhumans vs. X-men #0 is both a setup issue for a larger conflict and an Emma Frost story. It acts as a continuation of the events that unfolded in Death of X. In wake of Cyclops' death, she is the one who carries on the fight that he began. However, this is not one of those conflicts where a few extra hours in the Danger Room and a few team-ups with Deadpool can will equip the X-men for the coming battle.

Emma Frost doesn't try to be Cyclops in this story. She's going to fight his battles, but she's going to do it her way. That means using her wit, her cunning, and her willingness to do immoral things for moral reasons. It's what makes her the White Queen. It's what makes her a dangerous enemy and a questionable ally. Most importantly, though, it helps add some level of balance to the coming conflict.

It's still not balanced by any objective measure, but Emma Frost navigates this narrative in a manner that makes clear this won't be a simple shouting match between Storm and Medusa. This won't be a battle that Black Bolt can end just by whispering either. She gathers allies, makes deals with shady characters, and even trains herself to be ready in case her cunning and deceit just isn't enough. In the grand scheme of things, Emma Frost is the only one in the X-men who is actually prepared for a battle with the Inhumans.

Her story in Inhumans vs. X-men #0 carries the bulk of the dramatic weight and provides most of the substance. The role of the other characters involved, however, aren't quite as engaging. If anything, they reinforce the ongoing imbalance between the X-men and the Inhumans. It gives the ominous impression that one side still has way too many advantages for this to be a fair fight.

Throughout the narrative, the Inhumans carry themselves with an aura of selfish arrogance. They seem less concerned about helping an entire population of innocent mutants and more concerned about the possibility that they might have to fight a larger war with the X-men. They give the impression that they're more worried about being inconvenienced than saving lives. Even without the inherent imbalance between the two sides, it's hard to root for the Inhumans, given how they conduct themselves.

That's not to say the X-men are any easier to root for. Other than Emma Frost, Beast plays a major role in setting up the conflict, albeit indirectly. He's the only other character besides Emma who contributes to the drama, but his story is far less effective. His efforts to work with the Inhumans to resolve this conflict without violence are entirely noble in terms of intentions. Those intentions, however, clash with the unforgiving imbalance between the two sides. He's not the only one realizes that either.

Medusa, the current ruler of the Inhumans, goes so far as to adopt some of Emma Frost's tactics. She also understands that a conflict between the Inhumans and X-men is inevitable and that concerns her far more than any suffering the Terrigen Mists are inflicting. Even if her intentions are ethically suspect, her understanding of the situation is every bit as pragmatic as Emma's. Whether or not she can be as cunning as the former White Queen remains to be seen, but it definitely adds some intrigue to the coming conflict.

Inhumans vs. X-men #0 does succeed, albeit in a limited capacity, in creating some compelling stakes for the coming conflict. Both sides are preparing. Neither side wants to be caught off-guard. However, the issues that manifested in Death of X remain.

There are still inconsistencies between the events surrounding this conflict and the events that have unfolded in other X-books since Secret Wars. The strange and unwarranted hatred of Cyclops that seemed to fuel the X-men's narrative remains unexplained, which makes the conflict and the setup surrounding it feel incomplete and lacking in context.

In addition, characters not named Emma Frost do little to stand out. As a result, the impact of Inhumans vs. X-men #0 doesn't offer anything novel or groundbreaking. It just reinforces the inevitability and imbalance of a clash between the X-men and the Inhumans. One is poised to thrive. One is poised to die. One has Marvel's unconditional support with movie rights. One remains stuck under the thumb of Rupert Murdoch. At this point, it a sentiment that need not be reinforced.

Final Score: 6 out of 10

Incomplete Moments With Shallow Revelations: Death of X #4

The following is my review of Death of X #4, which was posted on PopMatters.com.

If a fight is rigged and rigged well, then it's usually hard to tell which side has the advantage. Those fights can be quite entertaining, as the success of WWE wrestling routinely demonstrates.  When the rigging is too obvious though, the entertainment value suffers. It's just not very fun or interesting when it's easy to tell who is getting an extra shot of Hulk blood on the side.

This is the biggest flaw in the Death of X narrative. It isn't a passionate disagreement between Iron Man and Captain America over methods for administering justice. It's a cage match between one side that has the unconditional backing of Disney's lawyers and another that remains under the boot of a rival company. The X-men and the Inhumans are not on a level playing field and haven't been since Marvel Studios began churning out billion-dollar blockbusters on a regular basis.

This means there's little to no suspense in the outcome of Death of X #4. It's a foregone conclusion that the X-men will lose, the Inhumans will come out on top, and the lawyers negotiating movie rights will keep getting billed by the hour. It gives Charles Soule and Jeff Lemire a poor foundation to build on, but it's a foundation that can still fill in some unresolved issues. They just have to build carefully because they don't want to give the X-men more reasons to resort to clones and time travel.

There's a genuine effort to extract every ounce of drama from this final issue, but there's not much worth extracting here. There's a distinct absence of detail and polish to the overall story. It does not complete the narrative that began in the first issue, nor does it fill in the blanks left by the various X-men titles that spun out of Secret Wars. There is some intrigue. There are some heated, passionate moments. It doesn't fall flat, but it does feel distinctly incomplete.

If there is a defining moment in Death of X #4, it manifests during the confrontation between Cyclops and the Inhumans royal family. This moment feels very much like a trailer of sorts, complete with ominous warnings and angry pleas. The trailer may lack the star power of Hugh Jackman or Sir Patrick Stewart, but it effectively ensures that there will be a war between the Inhumans and the X-men. It's not just inevitable at this point. It's overdue.

While this moment is vital in giving Death of X #4 the necessary impact, it's pretty much the only moment that's memorable or impactful in any way. Every other moment throughout the narrative is either lacking in substance or devoid of style. There's little else in terms of drama. None of that drama feels like an emotional gut punch either. For a comic where a major character dies, that's pretty telling.

It's also the most frustrating aspect about Death of X #4 and the X-men comics as a whole since Secret Wars. The lack of drama and the lack of details ensures this story adds little context to the overall narrative surrounding the X-men. Much of that narrative is crafted around this idea that Cyclops did something so horrific and so despicable that it would make James Marsden violently ill if someone said it out loud. That idea, however, becomes exceedingly complicated here.

It's not just because Soule and Lemire try to throw in a twist at the end that effectively ensures that Cyclops can die with some credibility intact. It's also because the sequence of events that unfold throughout Death of X do little to warrant such an idea. There's no overt atrocity here. Cyclops doesn't suddenly become Thanos, Victor Von Doom, or whoever canceled the last X-men cartoon. He does what he and the X-men always do and tries to protect innocent mutants.

Now this does draw the ire of the Inhuman royal family for reasons that are understandable, albeit petty. However, it's worth emphasizing here that what Cyclops does, be it overt or indirect, can't qualify as an atrocity. He doesn't kill anyone. He doesn't destroy anything. He doesn't even make a joke about Medusa's hair. There really is nothing here that warrants the hatred and disdain that is so prominent in the current X-men comics.

If there are any unforeseen consequences to Cyclops' actions, they aren't revealed. They aren't even hinted at. What Cyclops does simply prevents a cloud of Terrigen Mist from descending upon a populated area and killing every innocent mutant in its path. No human or Inhuman dies as a result. In fact, only one other person dies and that person dies willingly in a heroic sacrifice that the Inhuman royal family tried to prevent.

In terms of a balanced, albeit rigged, conflict, the entertainment value really suffers here. Death of X does little to create even the illusion of balance between mutants and Inhumans. If anything, it only shows that the Inhuman royal family is disturbingly comfortable letting an entire minority suffer horribly so their race can propagate. While Cyclops did make clear to them that he was just as comfortable letting the Inhumans stagnate, there's little effort to have a passionate, balanced discussion.

In terms of the bigger picture surrounding the X-men/Inhuman conflict, Death of X #4 has too many blanks to fill and not nearly enough ink to make a concerted effort. It does what it can, but not much else. There is a sense of rhythm and flow to the narrative. It never becomes too chaotic and it avoids completely denigrating certain characters, although there will likely be a certain segment of fans that will passionately disagree on message boards. There is a sense that this story is part of a much larger narrative that has yet to unfold.

Death of X #4 doesn't read like the end of an event so it's not going to check every box before the final page. While it manages to be coherent and revealing in some respects, it still comes off as woefully incomplete. If it were a school project, it couldn't be adequately graded because it doesn't present a finished product. This may be okay for a movie trailer, but for a complete story that kills off one of the most iconic X-men in history, it's not even close to being enough.

Final Score: 4 out of 10

The New Red Queen Chapter 4: Jackpots and Dreams is LIVE!

There was once a time when I really rooted for Peter Parker. That has always been part of his appeal. He was crafted as one of those guys you just want to see succeed. He’s always an underdog, getting screwed over at every turn, but still finding a way to fight through. I certainly embraced that appeal. I certainly rooted for him for many years in the comics, cartoons, and movies.

In many respects, this helped make his relationship with Mary Jane Watson so meaningful. After all his struggles and shitty luck, he manages to fall in love with a sexy, charismatic supermodel. It isn’t just that he deserves her. He fucking earned this woman’s love and she fights tooth and nail to cherish it. That’s what made their relationship so strong and endearing. That’s why it ranked as one of my favorite comic book romances for many years.

Sadly, we all know how this iconic relationship ended. We also know how Spider-Man’s story played out after. I could spend a dozen or so blog posts ranting about all the reasons why Peter Parker is total fucking asshat now, but I’ll save that for another time. The point is that it’s just too damn hard to root for Peter Parker. The man now just feels like a glorified man-child who screws himself over so the universe doesn’t have to. That’s not someone you root for. That’s someone you pity.

I still haven’t forgotten about that version of Peter Parker that I so eagerly rooted for. With the recent release of Spider-Man: Renew Your Vows, I’ve gotten a powerful reminder of just how lovable someone like Peter can be. As such, I’m doing my best to capture that lovability in The New Red Queen, all while making Mary Jane Watson sexy as hell. Then again, it’s not like you need to try too hard to make Mary Jane that sexy.

This story continues to exceed my expectation in terms of feedback. I’m still amazed at just how many people enjoy reading about an overtly sexy Mary Jane, but then again maybe I shouldn’t. The past few chapters have given Mary Jane some opportunities to flaunt her sex appeal, as only she can. The final chapters will give Peter Parker a chance to participate. Also, expect Emma Frost to contribute as well. That’s a lot of sex appeal in one story, but there can never be too much in a story with Mary Jane Watson. This next chapter should make that abundantly clear.

The New Red Queen

Chapter 4: Jackpots and Dreams

This latest sexy side-project of mine is almost complete. Again, I’m really amazed and honored that it’s gotten such a great response. I really do appreciate it. I’m certainly open to crafting another spin-off, but I want to first make sure that this story ends in as awesome and sexy a way possible. As always, please take the time to write me or comment. I’m certainly happy to chat, especially about the sexiness of Mary Jane Watson and Emma Frost. Nuff said!

Death of X #4: Nuff Said!

Well, it's here. The (unofficial) final review of nuff said. I've been looking at it the same way a cow looks at an oncoming train. I know it's coming. I know it's close. I'm just too bloated with hormones, illegal chemicals, and fatty foods to give enough shits. I want to say it's fitting that a series called Death of X is the final review for nuff said. However, with a title like Death of X, it's only fitting in the same way that a colonoscopy is a fitting way to end taco eating contest.

This is it. This is where we find out what the fuck Cyclops did that made him more hated than Chuck Austin, Brett Ratner, and the assholes that canceled Wolverine and the X-men after just one season. We know he's trying to stop the big green fart cloud that the Racist Xenophobic Slave-Owners refuse to do jack shit about. We know he's trying to save his species from extinction and sterilization yet again after having already gone through that shit before. At this point, who can blame him for losing his fucking mind and going evil?

It's still a big fucking blank to fill into just one issue. Death of X #4 has a fuckton of questions to answer if the events of Extraordinary X-men, Uncanny X-men, and All-New X-men are to make half a piece of dog shit worth of sense. I'm skeptical that it can do this in a way that won't piss off X-men fans, Cyclops fans, and fans of anything that actually makes sense. This being my last review for nuff said, I'll either have to be extra drunk or extra sober to get through it.

I get the feeling that Storm could use a few shots of bourbon on her end because she now has to contend with a determined and pissed off Magneto. She, and everyone else in the entire fucking Marvel universe, should know by now that he's not a fan of genocide by toxic gas. That shit is kind of a sensitive issue for him. Even those on the alt-right wouldn't push his buttons when there's a big green mutant-killing cloud on the loose.

He effectively ends the little spat between the X-men and the Racist Xenophobic Slave-Owners in Madrid. He doesn't kill or maim anyone, which for Magneto requires a level of self-restraint that would allow a guy like me to walk through a whiskey distillery and come out sober. Crystal and her genocide-enabling people better fucking count their blessings. The fact they have intact assholes in this situation should make them want to go out and buy an extra lotto ticket.

With Crystal's crew of Racist Xenophobic Slave-Owners neutralized, Cyclops and his team go to work stopping the big green cloud of death that's going to maim countless innocent mutants. Yet somehow, he's going to become the monster? No, it still doesn't make sense and spoiler alert, it's not going to no matter how much weed you smoke. If you have some though, fill your bong because you're going to need it.

Cyclops' plan doesn't involve genocide, bloodshed, or anything that may make Wolverine horny. It involves using Alchemy, the nerdy D-list mutant he recruited in the last issue, to turn the big green fart cloud into something that won't horribly maim innocent mutants. For some reason, the Racist Xenophobic Slave-Owners don't like the idea of their big green fart cloud NOT killing innocent mutants so they shoot him right out of the sky before he can read the cloud. Yes, a team of super-powered racist, xenophobic, slave-owners is pro-genocide and Marvel wants to give them a fucking TV show. Even the most bigoted neo-Nazi skin-head would be paralyzed by the WTF on display here.

However, an attack by a group of racist, xenophobic slave-owners who are okay with the idea of gassing an entire minority to death has never stopped the X-men before. Cyclops manages to find Alchemy, who now has a broken arm and no whiskey to dull the pain. He then gives him the kind of pep talk that would make high school football coaches envious, which helps Alchemy's balls grow ten times bigger so he can get another shot at giving a big middle finger to the Racist Xenophobic Slave-Owners. If I were a woman, I'd have jumped Alchemy's bone on the spot.

The Racist Xenophobic Slave-Owners are decidedly less horny. They somehow think in their racist, xenophobic, slave-owning minds that they've won. They've saved their big green fart cloud of mutant-killing death. They're fucking wrong. With Sunfire's help, Alchemy gets another shot. I assume he gave them all the finger somewhere along the way.

With help from Magik and the Stepford Cuckoos, the royal family of Racist Xenophobic Slave-Owners remains distracted. They can't take Alchemy down this time. Instead, he makes it into the big green fart cloud and uses his powers to turn it into a big red fart cloud, but it's a cloud that doesn't kill or maim anyone. To the rest of the non-racist, xenophobic, slave-owning population of the planet, that's a good thing. To the Racist Xenophobic Slave-Owners, it may as well be one big kick in the dick. Now I'd definitely jump Alchemy's bone, even if I'm not a woman.

Unfortunately, Alchemy isn't very bonable after this stunt. After turning the big green fart cloud into a harmless red fart cloud, he returns just in time to find out he's now dying of M-pox. That means he sacrificed himself to stop a big cloud of mutant-killing death. That's objectively awesome on every level. Again, this a D-list X-men character who hasn't been relevant since the Regan administration and he just gave the finger to the Racist Xenophobic Slave-Owners.

This issue is to Alchemy what the Dark Phoenix Saga is to Jean Grey. He sacrifices himself to save countless innocents. Alchemy, you are a true hero. May the next life be filled with endless pools of whiskey and endless hordes of naked Emma Frost clones. You've earned it.

It's a true hero's end for Alchemy. For Cyclops, however, it's not so noble, but it's every bit as heroic. He calls out the Racist Xenophobic Slave-Owners and the royal family responds. They're still shocked and appalled that someone would stop their big green fart cloud from maiming innocent mutants. I guess genocide and the suffering of minorities is important to the culture of the Racist Xenophobic Slave-Owners. Even the most ardent Bernie Sanders supporter would call bullshit on this and so does Cyclops.

The Racist Xenophobic Slave-Owners do and say nothing to justify their bullshit. They still act all appalled and offended that someone would dare to stop their big green fart cloud from killing innocent mutants. Cyclops boldly confronts them, flexes his nuts, presumably makes the red-headed Medusa extremely horny, and tells the royal family to fuck off. He makes clear that he's going to keep fighting these big green fart clouds of mutant-killing mayhem and if they don't like it, then they and their shitty movie rights can just go fuck themselves.

Naturally, the Racist Xenophobic Slave-Owners' first instinct is to just kill him. Yes, that's how Racist Xenophobic Slave-Owners solve problems. They kill those who want to stop an ongoing genocide. Hell, even racist skin-heads have the decency to just beat the shit out of minorities and say shitty things on message boards. For the Racist Xenophobic Slave-Owners, they don't even try to see things from Cyclops' side. They just let Black Bolt kill Cyclops so their big green fart clouds can continue maiming mutants.

Cyclops doesn't do anything to fight back. He just lets it happen. He doesn't really need to do anything. He claims that he's not just a leader now. He's an idea. He's an idea that inspires mutants and makes beautiful telepathic women horny. That idea can't die, no matter how much Black Bolt whines about it. It's one last epic middle finger that should make all the telpepaths, blondes, and redheads both proud and horny. It may be a somewhat inglorious way for Cyclops to die, but he dies giving the finger to Racist Xenophobic Slave-Owners. That means he dies with a hell of a boner.

A week later, the shit storm is settled. The big green mutant-killing fart clouds are still out there and the X-men bury their leader. There's a small ceremony on Muir Island. They even have the decency to give Cyclops a gravestone. Nobody spits on that gravestone though. Nobody shows any of the vehement Cyclops hatred we've seen in the post-Secret Wars X-men comics. It's almost like Cyclops didn't do anything that shitty. He just tried to destroy a mutant-killing gas cloud. So how the fuck is he now the most hated mutant that didn't appear in the Wolverine Origins movie?

That's not just a drunken remark. That's an honest fucking question and it's a question that doesn't get answered. That's a big fucking deal too because that means all this Cyclops-hatred that fueled so many shit storms still makes no fucking sense. It also means that everybody just agreed to let the Racist Xenophobic Slave-Owners keep their mutant-killing gas cloud. They're all suddenly okay with mutant genocide and yet Cyclops is the asshole? Seriously, what the everloving fuck?

Still confused? Well sit back and tuck your nuts in people because it's about to get even more fucked up. Remember all the nut-flexing and bravado that Cyclops had been demonstrating for the past few issues? Well, it turns out that Cyclops isn't the one doing the flexing. In fact, he was never even in a position to. Instead, that shit was all an illusion. I'm not talking about a David Blain/David Copperfield type of illusion that makes people pay several hundred bucks for a glorified stage show. I'm talking about a real actual mass delusion the likes of which would give British tabloids multiple orgasms.

Emma Frost, right after Cyclops' funeral no less, meets up with Havok, who was apparently too busy to participate in stopping mutant genocide. She reveals that Cyclops did pretty much none of the shit that has transpired in this series. He actually died in the first issue the second he entered Muir Island. There was no epic sacrifice. There was no final message from Jean Grey. He just took a whiff of the big Inhuman fart cloud and died. That's it. It's as inglorious and unfitting as it sounds.

Naturally, Emma Frost had a big fucking problem with this. She let this man see her naked without paying, damn it. He deserves better than that. So with the help of the Stepford Cuckoos, she projected a psychic image of Cyclops and that image is the one that did all the crazy shit that everyone in the world hates him for, even though there's no fucking reason given for that hatred. Even if there was, it still wouldn't be warranted because Cyclops still didn't do anything. He just went to Muir Island looking to help mutants and died, all because the Racist Xenophobic Slave-Owners didn't know their big fucking fart cloud maimed innocent mutants.

It's a big fucking blow to Emma Frost. Even though they broke up, she still makes clear that she cares about Cyclops more than she does most men who see her naked. The idea that an ex-lover of her's dies and it has nothing to do with her being pissed off and vindictive really fucks with her. She knows better than most that Cyclops is the only X-man with the balls to lead mutants against pro-genocide racist xenophobic slave-owners. Hell, she's probably licked them so she knows their power. Now, he's dead and she has to have the biggest balls in the X-men from now on. I guess she accepts that challenge.

It still makes for an unsatisfying, callous end for Cyclops. He doesn't die fighting to save his people. He dies because of some big green fart cloud. It's the kind of end that seriously fucks with Emma Frost's head because now she's intent on carrying on this idea she's created. She makes clear that without Cyclops, someone needs to have the balls to take on the Racist Xenophobic Slave-Owners and their big green fart cloud. It might as well be her. She knows how to bust balls. Now, she gets to flex them. In that sense, the Racist Xenophobic Slave-Owners are truly fucked in the long run. It's one thing to kill Cyclops and protect mutant-killing fart clouds. It's quite another to piss off Emma Frost.

So...is it awesome?

Short answer? Not really. Shorter answer. Not fucking close. Is it terrible? Well, that actually requires a longer answer because I can't just spit out my whiskey and say fuck yes. Even at my most drunk, that wouldn't recognize the full context of the story here. I can't say Death of X #4 is fucking awful because it isn't. It doesn't horribly butcher Cyclops' character like it promised. Hell, it makes him a victim of shitty luck, which is kind of appropriate for the guy who was lucky enough to see Emma Frost and Jean Grey naked in his lifetime.

Even if Cyclops doesn't go down in history as the worst thing to happen to the X-men since Chuck Austin and Brett Ratner, Death of X #4 is still an incomplete issue at best. It does set the stage for a future clash between the X-men and the Racist Xenophobic Slave-Owners. It even raises the personal stakes of that clash. It just doesn't fill in enough blanks in a satisfying way. Like a porn star using a dildo that's too small and doesn't vibrate, it just doesn't get the job done.

It doesn't shit all over the job and light it on fire either. These days, that's the best the X-men can hope for. Death of X #4's biggest shortcoming is that it doesn't give a damn good reason for why Cyclops is so hated. He didn't kill anybody. He did cause panic, but he didn't kill anyone. Hell, he wasn't even in a position to kill anyone. None of his fellow X-men came out and spit on his grave. Nobody was so disgusted by what he did that they wanted to vomit violently into the nearest trash can. All he did was turn a big green fart cloud into this creepy red mist. The worst he did was make it too easy to film a shitty horror movie.

Death of X #4 isn't going to traumatize X-men fans, but it's not going to get anyone's heart racing like the death of Jean Grey, the death of Charles Xavier, or the realization that X3 is officially retconned now. It is going to confuse the fuck out of many of them. It's also going to annoy the fuck out of Emma Frost fans and make the Cyclops-hating shit show that emerged after Secret Wars all the more confusing. Then again, if that's the worst that X-men fans have to endure these days, then that in and of itself is a win.

Final Score: 4 out of 10

PS: I really wish I could make my last profanity-laced, drunken rant of a review more uplifting. At the very least, it's not overly depressing, but I still feel like this is a good way to cap this off. I've enjoyed writing these reviews and I hope you've all enjoyed reading them, hopefully while both drunk and sober. Thanks again to everybody who supported my drunken ramblings. From the bottom of my failing heart, I thank you. Nuff said!