Thursday, December 19, 2013

All New X-men #22 Preview - Colors And Not Much More

I try to make every post in this blog as substantive as it is vulgar. I get that people these days have attention spans only as long as Lindsey Lohan’s latest arrest so I have to make them count. But every now and then, I can’t be too groundbreaking. I’m usually more than happy to smoke a couple joints and overlook a few details that probably won’t set anyone’s panties on fire. But with things heating up in All New X-men, namely the sexual tension between X-23 and O5 Cyclops, and the Trial of Jean Grey set to begin, I can’t be as lazy as usual. That’s painful for any stoner, but I like to think I’m more motivated than the stoners that fall asleep on Friday night and wake up Sunday because they played a Grateful Dead album on a loop.

Earlier this week, I did a post on a preview for All New X-men #22, which is the first issue of the Trial of Jean Grey. It thought it was a pretty big fucking deal, even if it was unlettered and in black and white. It left me drooling like a pervert in a panty factory, but it didn’t reveal much. Well it didn’t take long for Marvel to evoke even more drooling. Newsarama released the exact same preview. But this time, it was colored. So I guess readers can stop feeling like they’re back in the 50s and enjoy the exact same shit in all its colorful glory. I’m sorry, but there aren’t any words that could make that less underwhelming.

“The Trial of Jean Grey”

The arrival of the original X-Men in the present sent shockwaves through the Marvel Universe, but we’ve only seen the effects on Earth. When alien races learn that Jean Grey, host of the destructive Phoenix Force, is back on earth, they do something about it. Now it’s up to the rest of the All-New X-Men and the Guardians of the Galaxy to save Jean Grey from twisted intergalactic justice! Don’t miss two of Marvel’s biggest franchises crossing over for the first time!

I really don’t have much else to add other than this is a preview where I don’t have to take LSD to make it more colorful. So I guess my brain is grateful, but that’s really all I can say. I would love it if there was a better clue as to what O5 Cyclops and O5 Jean are yelling at each other about. For all I know, they’re yelling at O5 Angel for putting mayonnaise and ketchup on a bacon burger. I guess we won’t know until we finally get a preview with some fucking letters. Then I’ll finally know if I should be excited or hungry. Nuff said!

No comments:

Post a Comment