Deconstructing Superman's Philosophy: Superman Unchained #6

The following is my review of Superman Unchained #6, which was posted on PopMatters.com.

When it comes to battling Superman, history shows that beating him physically is like trying to win a tug-of-war with a black hole. He has taken on aliens, gods, evil geniuses, deranged clones, and a whole host of other threats that the Lex Luthors of the world can only fantasize about. But Superman has his share of vulnerabilities. Kryptonite is the most well-known and the method of choice for those looking to bring the Man of Steel down a peg. But there is another vulnerability that is rarely attacked. It may not make Superman as weak as a mountain of Kryptonite, but it can shake the foundation of who he is and why he does what he does down to its core. It’s a vulnerability that even Lex Luthor usually doesn’t exploit, if only because it seems so underhanded for someone of his genius. But in Superman Unchained #6, this vulnerability is attacked on an unprecedented level. And for once, Superman’s power and ideals cannot protect him.

When Superman Unchained began, Superman faced yet another physically demanding challenge from Ascension. On the surface, Ascension isn’t too different from the usual run-of-the-mill terrorists. They see all this progress and civilization in the same way a pyromaniac sees a pile of matches and a gallon of gasoline. It’s just meant to be destroyed. So using alien technology, they launch every nuclear missile on the planet. It sounds like the kind of thing Lex Luthor would do when he’s bored on a Saturday afternoon. But what Ascension does isn’t the greatest source of conflict. Them capturing Lois Lane isn’t even cause for much conflict. The true meat of the story comes from Superman’s tentative ally/enemy, Wraith.

In many ways, Wraith is an eerie reflection of Superman. He’s no Bizarro and not just because he can speak in complete sentences. He has Superman’s power and even shares his desire to use it for the greater good. But the concept of “the greater good” is very different for Wraith. Part of what makes Superman such an icon and an ideal is his willingness to save the whole world and everybody in it. This all seems so noble and for the most part it is. But in the same way communism sounds good on paper, that nobility hides an unpleasant complication to Superman’s approach to his mission.

This approach has to do with serving mankind in a more pragmatic way. Wraith constantly berates Superman about making hard decisions. For Wraith, that means allying himself with the likes of General Lane and the United States military. To Superman, that makes him a puppet whose strings are attached to easily corruptible men. Any old liberal would probably agree with that. However, this is what makes Wraith’s decision so hard. He understands that allying himself with General Lane is dangerous and makes him prone to acting as their trained pit-bull. But he’s willing to accept that danger in order to serve the greater good.

General Lane already showed Superman just how much good Wraith has done over the past few decades. He goes so far as to call Superman a coward for choosing to be adored by the world rather than getting his hands dirty and actually changing the world for the better. And he’s not wrong either. He and Wraith look at Superman like a man with a gun aimed at someone who is about to kill an innocent bystander. Superman would rather not fire that gun and not take that life, even if it means putting that bystander at risk. It’s difficult for someone who isn’t a four-star general to see because nobody ever hears about a war that is averted or a crime that is never committed. Superman has the power to stop those wars and those crimes, but he chooses not to.

That’s not to say that General Lane and Wraith’s choices are somehow more noble than Superman. When Ascension launches the missiles, Wraith’s first inclination is to protect the United States from destruction. That’s where he chose to place his loyalty. That means he is loyal to protect only one house from the path of a hurricane rather than save the neighborhood. But Superman goes after Ascension and once again defies all odds to stop every nuclear missile. This effectively demonstrates why Superman’s approach has merit. By not allying himself with only a segment of humanity, he is better able to save the entire world when it is threatened. Wraith thinks locally. Superman thinks globally. That’s what sets them apart, aside from Wraith looking like a World of Warcraft monster.

Superman Unchained #6 acts as a response of sorts to General Lane’s challenge for Superman. By not making the same choice as Wraith, he is able to save the world. Wraith didn’t even try to save the world. The puppet strings that General Lane attached wouldn’t allow him. But Superman takes it a step further. When Wraith comes back to attack him, Superman shows that being an idealist doesn’t mean he can’t be cunning. With help from Batman, he humbles Wraith in a way that is probably more satisfying than Superman would ever admit. He essentially finds Wraith’s version of Kryptonite and shoves it in his face. It doesn’t completely undermine Wraith’s approach, but it makes clear that Superman doesn’t share it.

At the same time, however, this clash of philosophies feels incomplete. Wraith gave his reasons for doing what he does. Now Superman has given his. But neither one of them really confronts the flaws in their approach. They both come off as stubborn. They choose to resort to mindless fighting as if that ever won an argument outside a boxing ring. That takes away from the larger conflict that has linked all the physical struggles that have manifested throughout Superman Unchained. But by the end of Superman Unchained #6, both sides show that they’re as cunning as they are stubborn so this philosophical divide might not be over. It’s a divide that can’t be resolved by resorting to Kryptonite, but for now it seems to be the favored approach.

Final Score: 8 out of 10

Captain America: The Winter Soldier Review - All American Awesome

Let's not lie to ourselves, people. America just isn't as popular as it used to be. The days of the all-American patriot has been replaced by a shitty Congress, two failed wars, Fox News, and reality TV shows. Mention America in some parts of the world and often the response will be along the lines of, "America? You mean that crazy country that contains five percent of the population, consumes 25 percent of the resources, and elected George W. Bush twice?" It's just way too easy to be overly cynical. Whenever someone claims to be all American these days, it's only a matter of time before that person starts with the gay-bashing, xenophobic, holier-than-thou bullshit. But there is still one American icon who can say he's an all-American hero without sounding like a douche-bag. And his name is Captain fucking America.

Feeling patriotic yet?

This is just one of the many reasons I was more excited for Captain America: The Winter Soldier than I was for any other comic book movie since Avengers. I've got nothing against Iron Man or Thor. They're awesome in their own right. But one of them is a womanizing drunk and the other one is a cocky demigod who gets to soak Natalie Portman's panties. That doesn't really make me feel patriotic. That just makes me feel inadequate. But Captain America is more than just a pretty boy. He embodies the most awesome qualities about America. The shit that gets Glenn Beck and Lou Dobbs horny are all perfectly conveyed in Steve Rogers, minus the gay-bashing and racism. The ideals of America may be more corny than a re-run of Leave It To Beaver. Truth, justice, law, and freedom seem like good talking points or the title of a Country music album. But Steve Rogers doesn't just believe in this shit. He actually fights for it. And he fights in some pretty badass ways.

Now the first Captain America movie had a pretty basic fight. All those beautiful American ideals were under attack by the Red Skull, Hydra, and the Nazis. It's impossible to get more anti-American than this without taking a shit in an apple pie. That movie did a great job of showing why Steve Rogers embodies everything that's awesome about America. Plus, he beat the shit out of Nazis. It's hard for a movie to be awesome that doesn't involve beating the shit out of Nazis. But the enemy in Captain America: The Winter Soldier isn't as clear cut. And even though it says Winter Soldier in the title, he's not the villain here. This whole movie is basically built around making Captain America fight for all the ideals of America, even if it means getting his ass kicked. It's a different kind of movie and a different kind of threat. But the way it's presented is every bit as awesome.

Feeling patriotic now?

I'll start off by just coming out and saying it. Captain America: The Winter Soldier is fucking awesome. Of all the Phase 2 Marvel movies that have hit the theaters, this is the best. However, it's not better by much. Anyone who enjoyed Iron Man 3 and Thor: The Dark World will probably enjoy this movie for the same reasons. But what sets Captain America: The Winter Soldier apart is the bigger picture. Iron Man 3 and Thor: The Dark World only had a limited impact. They affected mostly the characters around them. What happened in those movies isn't really felt by the larger Marvel MCU. But what happens in Captain America: The Winter Soldier is something that will be felt by damn near everyone that isn't in outer fucking space. And maybe that's why the next movie in Phase 2 is Guardians of the Galaxy. Without reading from the whole damn script, what happens in this movie basically undermines everything Captain America, SHIELD, Nick Fury, and the Avengers have done to protect the world. It's like being the only Giants fan in cage with 100 deranged Eagles fans tripping balls on meth.

Despite what the title says, the big enemy here isn't the Winter Soldier. In fact, he might as well be one of Kanye West's pit bulls. He's really nothing more than muscle. Granted, he's a badass, tough, ass-kicking muscle that gives Cap a fight every bit as tough as the Red Skull. But it's the assholes pulling his strings that are the real bastards. And in a revelation that shouldn't count as a spoiler to anyone who knows anything about Marvel comics in any capacity, Hydra is the one who tied those strings. That whole "cut off one head and two more take its place" isn't just a long-winded battle cry. It actually still applies here. But they've actually stepped up their game compared to the first Captain America movie. They're now working smarter and not harder. And that's where the big theme for Captain America: The Winter Soldier comes in.

Still not as evil as Nazis.

Captain America came from an era where the line between good and evil was very clear. America is good. Nazis are evil. It's so simple that it could be explained with a beer and cockroach. A lot of Cap's morals and ideals were forged in the World War II era. But in The Winter Solder, he's in a very different era with very different threats. The line between good and evil is really blurry. One man's terrorist is another man's freedom fighter. And as we saw in Iron Man 3, it's way too fucking easy to manipulate people into following some deranged sociopath who might just be a drunk. Hydra takes full advantage of this. It's even stated outright. When they try to take someone's freedom away, they fight back. So it's just much easier to convince them to give that freedom up. That saves them the trouble of building big ass war planes and bombing the shit out of major cities. It's probably not as fun and way more tedious, but it fucking works.

It may sound pretty fucked up, but is it really? We live in an era where basic human rights like privacy, freedom of association, and shooting a gun at an empty beer can for shits and giggles are being pissed on every day. Ask any minority who has ever been caught smoking weed how much their freedoms are valued. They'll probably tell America to fuck off and even Captain America couldn't blame them. He basically sees how SHIELD is now starting to operate in ways that the NSA only wishes they could operate. They're trying to basically create weapons so effective that they can kill anybody they want who just might be a threat. Never mind this bullshit about habeus corpus, getting a warrant, or innocent until proven guilty. After Loki launches an alien invasion, that's reason enough to shit all over the constitution. Some might call that an overreaction. I just call that too many people shitting themselves in terror at once.

At times, it seems SHIELD is the enemy. But SHIELD is not the enemy here. Hydra is the enemy. They're just an enemy that's a lot tougher to fight. That's why most of the action in The Winter Soldier involves running, sneaking, and general spy shit. It doesn't have the same class as James Bond and it shouldn't. Steve Rogers isn't some womanizing, smart-mouth drunk in a fancy suit. He's Captain fucking America. Even a few flirtations with Black Widow can't keep him from his mission to stop Hydra and save the ideal that is America. Let me say that again. Even flirtations from Scarlett Johannsen in a Black Widow costume can't distract this guy from his mission.

Suck it, James Bond!

Now this may be disappointing to some. In the first Captain America movie, there were plenty of romantic overtones and sub-plots with him and Agent Carter. And there are a few hints of that between Cap and Black Widow in this movie. But not much comes from it. All of those sub-plots are secondary for the most part. Black Widow is basically an ally and one of the few Captain America has. This actually might be better for her because it makes Black Widow much more than just a romantic interest. She demonstrates just how different she is from Captain America. She's a spy who lives in a world of lies. But in the end, she has to basically take a page from Cap's playbook and embrace the truth. And when a beautiful woman like Black Widow embraces the truth, that just makes her even sexier.

As if she needed it.

It's a nice and welcome change of pace from Iron Man 3 and Thor 2, which relied heavily on romantic sub-plots. This didn't have that. This just had Captain America teaming up with Black Widow, Nick Fury, Maria Hill, and his new buddy Falcon to take down Hydra before they could turn SHIELD against them. It's exciting, action-packed, explosive, sexy, and engaging. Every battle and every explosion is very well-done and nicely organized. Shit just doesn't randomly blow up Michael Bay style. And it's no over-the-top fighting on the level of Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon. It's the kind of action that feels perfectly appropriate for a comic book movie and more than fitting for a battle with Captain America.

That said, the movie isn't without its flaws. The scale is epic and the battles are awesome. But at times, the plot does drag. It mostly happens in the early parts of the movie, but it quickly picks up. In addition, Winter Soldier is really under-developed. He has some nice moments, but they're all quite lacking. He's not nearly as bad as Malaceth in Thor 2 or the Mandarin in Iron Man, but his impact on the story really is secondary to Hydra. He mostly serves as an extra source of emotion for Captain America and that emotion really doesn't resonate that well in the end.

But the flaws in this movie are too few and easily overshadowed by all the shit it does right. The story isn't as basic as the first Captain America movie. It shows an evolution of the plot and an evolution of the threats the Marvel movieverse is dealing with. And like every other Marvel movie to date, there is a post-credits scene that sets up Age of Ultron. However, I didn't find it all that mind-blowing. I might have just been too sober. But if anyone had to leave early, don't feel bad. Not much was missed.

So where does Captain America: The Winter Soldier rank in Marvel's already impressive library of awesome movies? Well, it's not better than Avengers. That bar is simply way too fucking high. And in some ways it's not better than the first Captain America movie or the first Iron Man movie for that matter. But it's a movie that definitely deserves to be in the conversation in terms of Marvel's best work. It took all of the awesome elements that fans of the previous movies have come to expect and served them with a bottle of whiskey and a plate of bacon. It's as satisfying a movie as anyone could ask for without seeing Scarlett Johannsen in a thong. But she's in a skin-tight outfit a number of times so it's still pretty damn close. I give Captain America: The Winter Soldier an 8 out of 10. See this movie. Embrace your inner patriot. It'll remind us all that America can still be pretty fucking awesome. Nuff said!

All New X-men #25 Lettered Preview - Haunting Beast

We all learn as kids that our actions have consequences. Some of those kids learn that lesson well and grow up to be functioning adults that contribute nicely to society. Some of those kids fail to learn that lesson and grow up to be regulars on Cops, Jerry Springer, or reality TV shows. A good portion of those that fail also become drunks and stoners. At least these failures have an excuse. It's hard to remember the consequences of our actions when we're in the middle of a bar fight or looking desperately for another box of pop tarts. But for people who are supposed to be brilliant as fuck, they have no excuse and deserve even less sympathy than the most miserable drunk.

This brings me to Hank fucking McCoy. I've made demeaning his hairy ass only my third most unhealthy habit. Some of my best rants on this blog involve how Beast has become to X-men what Justin Bieber has become to music. And I stand by all those rants. Going all the way back to Matt Fraction's run on Uncanny X-men, Beast has given readers no reasons whatsoever for sympathy. He doesn't lead. He doesn't bring any new ideas to the table. All he does is fucking bitch and moan about how Cyclops crossed too many lines while doing absolutely jack shit to give him an alternative. He's basically like a who who drives around, stops at horrific car wrecks, and yells at the drivers for horribly wounding themselves without giving them any possible means of making their situation better. If a guy like this existed in real life, he would be dead in a month.

But it was Beast's douche-baggery in the pages of All New X-men that made him an all star. It's not enough that he has to shit all over the timeline after the events of Age of Ultron make that sort of shit taboo. But he had to flat out lie to the O5 X-men, which includes himself no less, about why they need to come to the future. He told them a mutant genocide was imminent. Well not only was he eventually proven to be full of shit, but the O5 ended up ditching the Jean Grey Institute and joining the very team he said would commit the genocide. That's right up there the Catwoman movie in terms of epic fails. But has anyone really chewed his ass out for this shit? Hell no.

Well that might change in the giant-sized issue of All New X-men #25. Marvel has been billing this issue as more important than a tax return and a kidney transplant. It's supposed to mark a huge turning point in the story of the O5. That turning point already seemed to transpire with The Trial of Jean Grey. O5 Jean Grey herself said that this future is "all new." Well what the fuck does that mean for the timeline as a whole? Well it looks like Beast may finally have to confront the consequences of his bullshit according to CBR's lettered preview of All New X-men #25. I just say it's way too fucking late.

CBR: All New X-men #25 Preview

• OVER-SIZED 25th ISSUE!

• Artist Stuart Immonen is joined by a practical comic book artist hall of fame for this special landmark issue!

I really don't want to get my hopes up. Years of shitty X-men movies have taught me to know better. But unless I'm stoned out of my mind, it looks like someone is lecturing Beast on the bullshit assumptions he made when he decided to bring the O5 to the present. It also looks like we may get some insight into the possible timelines that have or might have transpired because of his actions. Adding in all these timelines is sure to make for some convoluted shit, but I think it'll help if the issue is giant sized. It's like the layers of a cake. It's hard to taste every one of them if they're not sufficiently thick.

And if I am willing to get my hopes up, I really would like to see at least a partial explanation as to why the O5 X-men can't go back to the past. That shit still hasn't been explained and X-men Battle of the Atom ended months ago. I admit some shit just slips my mind, be it a court date or my girlfriend's birthday. But some shit just cannot and should not be glossed over. It's like leaving a bullet wound untreated. Unless Chuck Norris is involved, it can only make things worse.

But again, that might be asking for too much. I still refuse to get my hopes up. I refuse to assume I know what to expect with this game-changing, ball-busting, giant sized issue of All New X-men. But so far, All New X-men has delivered the kind of consistent awesome that I look forward to almost as much as a trip to a Tijuana whore house. For something this big, I'm going to allow myself to get a little excited, at least until I get a new batch of weed. This comic will be worth the higher price if at some point Beast finally owns up to his bullshit. I'm not going to expect it. But if his furry ass is sore by the end of this, then I shall gladly deem this overpriced stack of pages awesome. Nuff said!

X-men Supreme Reflections Announcement and Pic Update

It feels like I’ve been working on the X-men Supreme fanfiction series for a long time. And in many respects, I have. I began this fanfiction series in 2010. That means I’ve been working on it for four years. There are comic book series that don’t last that long, especially those on a bi-weekly update schedule. In that respect, I like to think X-men Supreme has achieved something special in that time. And with the end of X-men Supreme Volume 4: Politics of Fear, those achievements now have a larger context.

As I’ve announced before, I have every intention of continuing this fanfiction series into Volume 5. I do have plans beyond that, but I am still undecided on whether I’ll pursue those plans. It certainly has helped that I saw a slight uptick in feedback with the end of X-men Supreme Volume 4: Politics of Fear. It also helps that some, such as a very generous reader named Callum, took the time to contact me and helped me find out that there was a problem with my email filters. I want this fanfiction series to keep growing. And I want X-men Supreme’s appeal to expand. I know it’s difficult generating the same passion with a fanfiction series as the comics. But I’m going to keep treating X-men Supreme with the expectation that it’s possible to inspire such passion.

X-men Supreme Volume 4: Politics of Fear had a lot of upheavals. My main goal with this era of X-men Supreme was to make the X-men’s struggle a more global struggle. President Robert Kelly and General Nathan Grimshaw shifted the fight away from battling Sentinels and Magneto to battling public opinion. This culminated with the treaty that was signed in Issue 97: Uneasy Truce that attempts to fight conflict by generating prosperity, courtesy of Shi’ar technology. And while this will create some new conflicts, the next era of X-men Supreme will focus more on personal conflicts.
I already offered a hint of it. Characters like Sinister and Mystique will have some important moments. There’s also the matter of Colonel Wraith and Reverend Stryker, who already did their share of damage in X-men Supreme Volume 4: Politics of Fear. And don’t forget X-men Supreme’s newest addition, Weapon X-23. There’s a lot to deal with in this new era of X-men Supreme. But before I begin exploring this bold new world, I will be doing another installment of X-men Supreme Reflections. I’ll be taking five characters and delving into their psyche, offering a fresh perspective on who they and what they’re dealing with. I will announce the first character of focus in one week and I’ll be including a preview of it as well.

I am still committed to making the X-men Supreme fanfiction series as awesome as it can be. However, I am also pursuing other writing endeavors. In addition, I am attempting to become a published author. My book, Skin Deep, has been available for a while now and I have every intention of writing more. But because of these efforts, updates might not be as frequent. I’ll try to stick to my bi-weekly schedule, but that may change. But make no mistake. I will continue X-men Supreme Volume 5 until it is completed. And regardless of what other projects I have going on, I hope X-men Supreme can help me refine my craft.

But this is not to say that I don't have something to add for this update. Recently, Marvel completed a major crossover event between All New X-men and Guardians of the Galaxy entitled, The Trial of Jean Grey. It was a good story and one I reviewed on my blog. In the spirit of this story, I felt the time was right to do an update to the pics section for Jean Grey. She's becoming an increasingly important figure in the comics. Expect her to do the same in X-men Supreme.

Phoenix Pics

Jean Grey Pics

As always, a lot of that depends on the feedback I get from readers. The more support I have, the more confident I am that I can continue X-men Supreme through Volume 5 and beyond. So please take the time to send me your feedback by either contacting me or posting it in the comments section of each issue. I look forward to exploring this next era of the X-men Supreme fanfiction series. Until then, take care and best wishes. Excelsior!

Jack

Scanned Thoughts: Magneto #2

There are certain breeds of assholes that do varying degrees of damage. At the bottom of the pecking order are the assholes who never repay loans, drive really slow in the fast lane, hook up with beautiful women only when they’re drunk, and watch Bill O’Riley like it’s actually news. But at the top of that order is a different kind of asshole. This is the kind of guy who takes that same ruthlessness and uses is to get shit done. They’ll run over a few people, give the finger to anyone else who gets in their way, and not bat an eye every step of the way. But if they do all this and the end result is a few Nazis die, a bus full of children are saved, or Glen Beck starts crying uncontrollably, then that puts this breed of asshole on a different level. Magneto has been an asshole for most of his existence. And to be fair, he has plenty of reasons to act that way. Since his return to the X-books in the pages of Uncanny X-men, he’s not quite the asshole he used to be. But now that he’s got his own solo series where he’s hunting down mutant-hating douche-bags like escaped Nazis, he’s back to his roots. Magneto #2 offers some insight into how an asshole like Magneto can still get shit done. He may not be a very nice guy, but he’ll accomplish more than every hippie who ever lived before breakfast.

Magneto already accomplished plenty in the previous issue. He tracked down a suspected mutant murderer to a local jailhouse with the intention of doing to him what a hungry Vladimir Putin does to wounded bears. But this plan went to shit when he found out that this wannabe mutant-hater turned out to be an Omega Sentinel. That meant less bloody dismemberment and more property damage. It got the job done and showed Magneto that he was going to have to kill far more people than he thought. But for the poor bastards that got in his way, they’re going to need plenty of therapy and a shit-load of duct tape.

As the locals are assessing the damage and interviewing traumatized witnesses that will probably need a ton of weed to function from now on, a few SHIELD agents show up. This acts as a nice interplay between the events in this series and the events in Uncanny X-men. SHIELD has already been going after Cyclops as their most wanted fugitive, but Magneto is a close number two. And when he goes on a killing spree in some small town in California, that gets their attention. I still think it’s pretty fucked up that SHIELD is focusing so much on Cyclops, a hero who killed one person while under the influence of a cosmic force, while only dedicating a fraction of the energy to Magneto, a long-time villain who is as casual about killing people as I am about my weed use. But I digress. The point of this scene here is to show that Magneto’s mini-rampage isn’t going unnoticed and SHIELD is going to pursue his ass.

That being said, they’re way fucking behind because they don’t show up again at all in this issue. Magneto has already slipped away and is hot on the trail of whoever was behind unleashing the Omega Sentinel. Before he got to the slaughtering, Magneto found out that the man who murdered that mutant was turned into an Omega Sentinel against his will. And he happened to come from a place that few people give a sliver of horse shit about. It shows that in addition to deserving a molten steel enema, the people he’s dealing with are as smart as they are immoral. Makes me think they’re probably funded by Goldman Sachs.

This is what leads Magneto to a tent city. It’s actually pretty appropriate and Magneto himself points this out. There’s some great inner monologue here as he looks around at these people and sees them in a context very different from what is probably shown on Fox News. He sees these people as desperate and destitute, having been outcast by society and left to fend for themselves. They’re basically the people that society has screwed over to the point where they’re without hope and just trying to survive. That makes them tragedies worthy of a Lifetime movie, but it also makes them vulnerable as hell. And whereas Dr. Doom would only see insects dressed in human flesh, Magneto sees a familiar sight.

This leads to an extensive flashback that explores a defining part of Magneto’s life that often gets lost behind the goofy helmets and righteous slaughter. Before he was Magneto, he was a poor Polish boy running from Nazi oppressors. And on one rainy night in 1942, he teamed up with a couple of other poor boys to smuggle food for their hungry families. It’s a similar situation to the people in the tent cities, but this one involves Nazis. That makes it at least a billion times worse by default.

Now I normally have a low tolerance for flashbacks in the same way I have a low tolerance for someone who steals my weed. But every so often, a flashback actually works to make the events in the present more meaningful. It’s almost as rare as Al Sharpton not playing the race card on an issue, but when it does happen it’s a beautiful thing. It’s not as entertaining as seeing Magneto horribly maim Nazis with a billion rusty nails. And it doesn’t have to be. It just has to fit the moment.

Back in the present, Magneto isn’t running from Nazis. But he’s still in a neighborhood that’s about as friendly and welcoming as the Vatican is to Richard Dawkins. So when some old guy actually approaches Magneto with open arms and good manners, that immediately raises some red flags. Magneto probably knows as I well as I do that a friendly face in a rough part of town is either trying to sell drugs, steal wallets, or doing recruiting for a religious cult. All are potentially dangerous, but Magneto is a dangerous guy so he goes with it. He’s still searching for more information on who is turning people into Omega Sentinels and if he has to risk hearing a sermon about Xenu, then that’s an okay price to pay.

The old man is polite at first. He invites Magneto into his tent. He even offers him food which doesn’t appear to be laced with meth or codeine. That alone should put Magneto’s concerns at ease somewhat. But this is Magneto. Manners only go so far with him in the sense they’ll only delay the horrible maiming he’ll inflict if he doesn’t get what he wants. He basically tells the old man to cut the crap and tell him about the guy from this tent city that got turned into an Omega Sentinel. Lucky for this polite old man, he doesn’t say anything that will get him maimed.

However, he does say something that adds some complications to Magneto’s mission. Apparently, some random guys who aren’t Mormons looking for converts have been coming to this tent city and recruiting people with jobs. It seemed like a perfectly generous thing to do for a bunch of desperate and destitute people. Then they noticed that the people who get these jobs never come back and are never heard from again. Either these jobs are making them filthy fucking rich while they lounge around a pool in Bali or something really horrible has happened to them. And in a community devoid of hope, it’s usually wise to assume the latter.

This takes us back to the flashback to 1942 Poland, a time and place that couldn’t be shittier for poor and destitute boys like Magneto. In trying to smuggle food for their families, he and the two other boys are caught by a couple of Nazi soldiers. Magneto and one of the boys, Levi, manage to hide in a wall. But the other gets cornered and since this isn’t a Call of Duty game, he’s pretty fucked. He basically has no choice but to admit that he has been stealing food that could otherwise be used to feed Hitler’s armies as they kill and torture everyone they invade. And in Nazi Germany, that’s a pretty serious crime.

But it’s not enough to put this poor boy in a difficult position. These are Nazis. They take douche-baggery to a disgusting level. They suspect this kid has friends that he’s working with. So they offer him a deal so that he’s not quite as fucked. If he gives them the names of his friends, he gets to go home and even gets to keep the food he stole. By Nazi standards, that’s a pretty sweet deal. Doing so means Magneto and Levi would be both betrayed and fucked, but he gets to eat and so does his family. For a hungry young boy, it’s too easy a decision.

That’s where that Nazi douche-baggery comes in. Even though the boy gives the Nazis what they want, they don’t hold up their end of the bargain. Apparently, making a deal with a Nazi is a lot like making a deal with Tony Soprano when he’s on a meth binge. As soon as the boy gives them what they want, the Nazis shoot the poor boy in the head. And that, my friends, is what separates Nazis from traditional douche-bags. I hope I don’t need to emphasize this point any further because that would require more blow than I have on hand at the moment.

Back in the present, this flashback gains even greater context. Magneto continues to muse at how desperation makes people vulnerable. And if someone is a Nazi-level douche-bag, they’ll find a way to exploit that vulnerability. It’s tragic, but true. Just ask any impoverished Native American. But Magneto, even with broken powers, isn’t vulnerable. Hell, he’s the very opposite of vulnerable. And once he learns about these sick fucks who are turning these vulnerable people into Omega Sentinels, he waits around the tent city until night for them to arrive. When they show up, he welcomes them the same way lion welcomes a wounded zebra.

The battle that follows isn’t much of a battle. It’s nowhere near as destructive or as flashy as Magneto’s battle with the Omega Sentinel in the previous issue. And in a book that hasn’t had a lot of action, that’s somewhat of a drag. It’s still brutal as hell. He puts some rusty nails to good use and uses these sick bastards as a walking pin cushions. It’s pretty one-sided. It’s basically yet another demonstration of how Magneto can be pretty damn ruthless if he’s sufficiently pissed. It’s a point that has already been made before, but I guess it’s worth belaboring.

It would have been okay if he just stopped at maiming these people. But Magneto wouldn’t be Magneto if he didn’t go the extra mile. This is where that flashback scene really gives the story the added impact. Magneto keeps one of the assholes alive and turns a gun on him, demanding that he give him more information about this sick program that turns people into mutant-killing Omega Sentinels. The man, who already has over a dozen nails stabbing him all over his body, tells him everything. There’s only so much honor and loyalty a man can manage when he’s got a gun to his head and rusty nails in his face.

But like the Nazi from the flashback, Magneto doesn’t keep his end of the deal. He fucking kills the guy after he tells him everything. This alone wouldn’t be too surprising given Magneto’s casual attitude towards righteous slaughter. But it’s the presence of the flashback that really gives this moment the right impact. It’s one of those rare moments where a flashback makes what happens in the present more awesome. I don’t know when I’ll ever be able to say that again so I think we should all cherish this like the last can of beer in a six-pack.

This issue and this series as a whole seems to have one primary goal, which is to remind readers who may have gotten drunk off Matt Fraction’s Uncanny X-men run that Magneto is not a hero. He’s not a villain either. But even by the post-Justin Bieber standards of today, he’s not a nice person. However, unlike Justin Bieber, Magneto’s cold murderous rage has meaning to it. He doesn’t kill, maim, and manipulate people because it gives him a raging boner. He does it because he has a mission. He has taken it upon himself to royally fuck up anyone who tries to fuck with the mutant race and not by handing them over to the police either. And unlike the first issue, this issue added some additional depths to Magneto’s motivations by flashing back to his life as a victim of Nazi oppression. It made the way he maimed those assholes who attacked the tent city all the more powerful. It’s that impact that makes me smile and sick to my stomach that leads me to give Magneto #2 an 8 out of 10. This is the Magneto that the X-men comics have been missing since flip phones were still in style. Even though it involves Magneto horribly murdering people in ways that would make vegans vomit uncontrollably, it’s still a beautiful thing. Nuff said!